Page 17 - IAV Digital Magazine #515

iAV - Antelope Valley Digital Magazine
A gynecologist had become so fed up with mal- practice insurance and HMO paper- work he burned out. Hoping to try another career where skillful hands would be beneficial, he decided to become an auto mechanic.
He went to the local technical college, signed up for classes, attended diligent- ly, and learned all he could. When the time for the practical exam approached, the gynecologist pre- pared carefully for weeks and com- pleted the exam with tremendous skill.
When the results came back, he was surprised to find that he had obtained a score of 150%. Fearing an error, he called the instructor, saying, "I don't want to appear ungrateful for such an outstand- ing result, but I wonder if there is an error in the
grade?"
The instructor said, "During the exam, you took the engine apart perfectly, which was worth 50% of the total mark. You put the engine back together again perfectly, which is also worth 50% of the mark. This equaled an A". After a pause, the instructor added, "I gave you an extra 50% because you did it all through the muffler, which I've never seen done in my entire career."
When you get to be a certain age, there are two things you defi- nitely don’t want to do in the same week...
Upgrade your prescription glass- es and buy a full- length mirror!
Ernie: The nation- al sport in Spain is bull fighting and in England it’s cricket.
Bernie: I’d rather play in England.
Ernie: Why do you say that?
Bernie: It’s easier to fight crickets.
A lawyer named Strange passed away. His friend asked the tomb- stone maker to inscribe on his tombstone, "Here lies Strange, an honest man, and a lawyer."
The inscriber insisted that such an inscription would be confus- ing, for a passer- by would tend to think that three men were buried under the stone.
However, he sug- gested an alterna- tive. He would inscribe, "Here lies a man who was both honest and a lawyer."
That way, when- ever anyone walked by the tombstone and read it, they would be certain to remark, "That's Strange."
Inventor Unveils Airbag Jeans To Protect Motorcyclists In Crashes
By Ben Hooper
Jan. 22 (UPI) -
- A designer of safety equipment for motorcyclists unveiled his lat- est invention: jeans fitted with airbags to pre- vent leg injuries in crashes.
Moses Shahrivar, who has been designing motor- cycle safety jeans since part- nering with Harley-Davidson Sweden 16 years ago, said his lat- est invention
uses similar technology to airbag-equipped vests that are currently on the market for pro- tecting a rider's chest, back and neck in a crash.
The jeans, which Shahrivar demonstrated in a YouTube
video posted to the official account of his Mo'Cycle brand, are tethered to the rider's motor- cycle, and when the tether is pulled airbags
deploy up and down the wear- er's legs to cush- ion an impact.
Only one proto- type of the Airbag Inside Sweden AB jeans currently exists, but Shahrivar is in the process of getting the jeans certified to European Union health and safety standards and hopes to bring them to market in 2022.
iAV - Antelope Valley Digital Magazine