Page 17 - IAV Digital Magazine #537

iAV - Antelope Valley Digital Magazine
A man writing at the post office desk was approached by an older fellow with a postcard in his hand. The old man said, "Sir, I'm sorry to bother you but could you address this post- card for me? My arthritis is acting up and I can't even hold a pen."
"Certainly, sir," said the younger man. He wrote out the address and also agreed to write a short message and sign the card for the man. Finally, the younger man asked, "Now, is there anything else I can do for you?"
The old fellow glanced at the card a moment and said, "Yes, at the end could you just add, 'PS: Please excuse the sloppy hand- writing.'?"
Happiness is walking through the green grass barefoot....
Misery is walking through the green grass barefoot and then discov- ering it's a cow pasture.
A young banker decided to get his first tailor made suit. So he went to the finest tailor in town and got measured for a suit. A week later he went in for his first fitting. He put on the suit and he looked stunning, he felt that in this suit he can do business. As he was preening himself in front of the mirror he reached down to put his hands in the pockets and to his surprise he noticed that there were no pockets.
He mentioned this to the tailor who asked him, "Didn't you tell me you were a banker?"
The young man answered, "Yes, I did."
To this the tailor said, "Who ever heard of a banker with his hands in his own pockets?"
Onedayata local café, a woman suddenly called out, "My daughter’s chok- ing! She swal- lowed a nickel! Please, anyone, help!"
Immediately a
man at a nearby table rushed up to her and said he was experienced in these situa- tions. He calmly stepped over to the girl, then with no look of con- cern, wrapped his arms around her and squeezed. Out popped the nickel.
The man returned to his table as if nothing had hap- pened.
"Thank you!" the mother cried. "Tell me, are you a doctor?"
"No," the man replied. "I work for the IRS."
So I'm heading up to my parents house driving like 90 mph when a lady cop pulls me over, comes up to my car and she's like...
"Young man, speeding? I've been waiting for you all day."
I look up to her and I say, "I'm so sorry I'm late offi- cer, I got here as fast as I could..."
JapaneseProf DevelopsTV Screen Viewer Can Taste
By Ben Hooper
Dec. 23 (UPI) -
- A professor at a Japanese univer- sity unveiled his latest innovation: a TV with a screen the view- er can taste.
Homei Miyashita, an associate pro- fessor in the School of Science and Technology at Meiji University, said his "Taste the TV" in inven- tion uses a com- bination of 10 fla- vors to create the taste of the food pictured on the screen.
The flavor is dis- pensed onto a film that slides onto the screen, allowing viewers to experience the taste of the food they are seeing.
The professor said he believes the technology could be used to give people unable or unwill- ing to travel the ability to sample flavors from around the world.
"I am thinking of making a plat- form where tastes from all over the world can be distrib- uted as 'taste content'. It's the same as watch- ing a movie or listening to a song that you like," Miyashita told reporters at a demonstration.
"I hope people can, in the future, download and enjoy the flavors of the food from the restaurants they fancy,
regardless of where they are based in the future."
Miyashita said on the college's website that his work is aimed at "reviewing the relationship between humans and content."
"I designate humans as beings who can- not help but cre- ate, express and consume con- tent, and have a new name for humans: 'content respirators.' I believe that we cannot build a new human-con- tent relationship unless we desig- nate content as being as impor- tant as food and air," he wrote.
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