Page 17 - IAV Digital Magazine #464
P. 17
iAV - Antelope Valley Digital Magazine
Three handsome male dogs are walking down the street when they see a beautiful, enticing, female Poodle.
The three male dogs fall all over themselves in an effort to be the one to reach her first, but end up arriving in front of her at the same time.
The males are speechless before her beauty, slob- bering on them- selves and hoping for just a glance from her in return.
Aware of her charms and her obvious effect on the three suitors, she decides to be kind and tells them, “The first one who can use the words “liver” and “cheese” together in an imaginative, intelli- gent sentence can go out with me.”
The sturdy, muscu- lar black Lab speaks up quickly and says “I love liver and cheese.”
“Oh, how childish,” said the Poodle, “That shows no imagination or intelligence what- soever.”
She turned to the tall, shiny Golden Retriever and said: “How well can you do?”
“Ummm...I HATE liver and cheese,” blurts the Golden Retriever.
“My, my,” said the Poodle, “I guess it’s hopeless. That’s just as dumb as the Lab’s sen- tence.”
She then turns to the last of the three dogs and says, “How about you, lit- tle guy?”
The last of the three, tiny in stature but big in fame and finesse, is the Chihuahua.
He gives her a smile, a sly wink, turns to the Golden Retriever and the Lab and says, “Liver alone, cheese mine.”
A rabbit one day managed to break free from the labo- ratory where he had been born and brought up.
As he scurried away from the fencing of the com- pound, he felt grass under his lit- tle feet and saw the dawn breaking for the first time in his life.
“Wow, this is great,” he thought.
It wasn’t long before he came to a hedge and after squeezing under it he saw a wonderful sight – lots of other bunny rabbits, all free and nibbling at the lush grass.
“Hey,” he called. “I’m a rabbit from the laboratory and I’ve just escaped. Are you wild rab- bits?”
“Yes. Come and join us,” they cried. Our friend hopped over to them and started eating the grass. It tasted so good. “What else do you wild rabbits do?” he asked.
“Well,” one of them said. “You see that field there? It’s got carrots growing in it. We dig them up and eat them.”
This, he couldn’t resist and he spent the next hour eat- ing the most succu- lent carrots. They were wonderful.
Later, he asked them again, “What else do you do?”
“You see that field there? It’s got let- tuce growing in it. We eat that as well.” The lettuce tasted just as good and he returned a while later com- pletely full.
“It’s fantastic out here in the world,” he told them.
“So are you going to live with us then?” one of them asked.
“I’m sorry, I had a great time but I can’t.” The wild rabbits all stared at him, a bit sur- prised. “Why? We thought you liked it here.”
“I do,” the rabbit replied. “But I must get back to the lab. I’m dying for a cig- arette.”
Woman’s Toes Look
Just Like Fingers,
Internet Loses It
They say that all a mother prays for is that her baby is born with 10 fingers and 10 toes... but what about 10 fingers and 10 toe-finger hybrids?
A Taiwanese woman shared pictures of her finger-like toes that have since sent the internet into a tailspin.
The original post, which first appeared on a site
called Dcard and was shared on the site’s Facebook, has racked up nearly 500 shares and 11,000 likes, and it isn’t exactly hard to see why.
Though the woman reports that she is only 151cm, or 4′ 11′′, tall, an image in her blog post shows one of her lengthy metatarsals clocking in at an impressive 5cm, or 2in.
Yet as trivial as
something like toe size may seem, the post’s author admits she’s actually received some ridicule for her unusual charac- teristic.
DailyMail trans- lated her post, and it reads in part, “Since my childhood, I have always drawn attention when- ever I wear flip- flops. [People] would surround me and discuss about me as if I
were an animal. [I] have even been told that I hadn’t evolved properly. Some people would ask me to use my “four hands” to climb a tree.”
Besides the extreme difficulty she must have finding shoes that fit properly, we see no rea- son for haters to try and knock her down — her bal- ance must be extraordinary.
iAV - Antelope Valley Digital Magazine