Page 17 - IAV Digital Magazine #505
P. 17

iAV - Antelope Valley Digital Magazine
Little Johnny, instead of an apple, would daily bring his new teacher a pretzel from his uncle's bakery. She always thanked Little Johnny but one day she said, "These pretzels are very good but do you think your uncle could make them with no salt?"
Every day after- wards the pretzel was salt free. After a while the teacher felt she was making too much extra work for Little Johnny's uncle to make them without salt especially for her.
"Little Johnny, I hope your uncle is not going to any great time to prepare the pret- zel without salt?"
"Oh no," replied Little Johnny, "he doesn't make them without salt. I lick the salt off."
A company owner was asked a question, "How do you motivate your employees to be so punctual?"
He smiled & replied, "It's sim- ple. I have 30
employees and 29 free parking spaces. One is paid parking."
A popular motiva- tional speaker was entertaining his audience. He said: "The best years of my life were spent in the arms of a woman who wasn't my wife!"
The audience was in silence and shock. The speaker added: "And that woman was my mother!"
Laughter and applause. A week later, a top man- ager trained by the motivational speaker tried to crack this very effective joke at home during a small party. He was a bit foggy after having a drink or two. He said loudly, "The greatest years of my life were spent inthearmsofa woman who was not my wife!"
The wife went red with shock and rage. Standing there for 20 sec- onds trying to recall the second half of the joke, with the guests not saying a
word, the manag- er finally blurted out, "... and I can't remember who she was!"
Elizabeth was surprised to receive ten dol- lars from her Aunt for her birthday. The Aunt asked how she was going to spend it.
"I'm taking it to Sunday School and giving it to God." the little girl replied. "He'll be just as surprised as I was at not getting a dollar like usual."
One day, after a man had his annual physical, the doctor came out and said, "You had a great checkup. Is there anything that you'd like to talk about or ask me?"
"Well," he said, "I was thinking about getting a vasectomy."
"That's a pretty big decision. Have you talked it over with your family?"
"Yeah, and they're in favor 12 to 1."
Aquarium Drains Wishing Waterfall For 100 Gallons Of Extra Cash
By Ben Hooper
Aug. 12 (UPI) -
- An aquarium in North Carolina said it drained a wishing waterfall to cash in on 14 years of tossed coins -- about 100 gallons' worth.
The North Carolina Aquarium in Pine Knoll Shores said employ-
ees drained the waterfall, which
for 14 years served as a wishing fountain for visitors seek- ing to trade their coins for good luck.
The aquarium said employees sifted out about 100 gallons of coins -- as well as objects includ- ing eyeglasses, toys and jewelry. Officials said the money removed from the waterfall
will go toward care for the ani- mals at the facili- ty, which has been closed to the public for nearly six months amid
the COVID-
19 pandemic. They said employees do not yet know exactly how much money was removed from the water- fall.
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