Page 17 - IAV Digital Magazine #533

iAV - Antelope Valley Digital Magazine
Do you know the punishment for bigamy?
Two mothers-in- law.
Her: Could you loan me ten dol- lars please?
Him: What did you say?
Her (a bit louder): Could you loan me twenty dollars please?
Him: I thought you asked for ten!
Research shows that laughing for 2 minutes is just as healthy as a 20 minute jog.
So now I'm sitting in the park laugh- ing at all the jog- gers.
Studying our wed- ding photos, my six-year-old asked, “Did you marry Dad because he was good-looking?”
“Not really,” I replied.
“Did you marry him for his money?”
“Definitely not,” I laughed. “He did- n’t have any.”
“So,” he said, “you just felt sorry
for him?”
My wife and I were dining out at a nice restaurant. I overheard the couple at the next table discussing their bill.
"Well Mary," said the man, "Near as I can figure, based of the price of the ham dinner you just ate, we got a hog back on the farm that's worth at least $137,000."
A visitor to a cer- tain college paused to admire the new Hemingway Hall that had been built on campus.
"It's a pleasure to see a building named for Ernest Hemingway," he said.
"Actually," said his guide, "it's named for Joshua Hemingway. No relation."
The visitor was astonished. "Was Joshua Hemingway a writer, also?"
"Yes, indeed," said his guide. "He wrote a check."
Norma and Sonia were talking
about their grand- children after the holidays. Norma said, "My daugh- ter-in-law stopped making my grand- children send their 'thank you' notes. Each year I sent the grand- children a card with a generous check inside. I always received a lovely `thank you' note. However, since my daugh- ter-in-law stopped making the grand- kids send thank you notes, I never hear from them."
Sonia said, "My daughter-in-law never made the grandchildren send `thank you' notes. I too send them a very gen- erous check. However, for the past several years, I hear from them within a week after they receive it. In fact, they each pay me a personal visit."
"Wow," remarked Norma. "I wish mine would do that."
"You can, Norma, you can."
"How?" Norma asked
"Simple. Do what I do. Don't sign the check."
Mobile Home Abandoned In The Middle of Missouri Road
By Ben Hooper
Oct. 28 (UPI) -
- Police in Missouri are ask- ing for the pub- lic's help to solve the unusual mys- tery of a mobile home abandoned in the middle of a road.
The Greene County Sheriff's
Office said in a Facebook
post that some- one abandoned mobile home in the Republic area, near the intersection of Farm Road 168 and Farm Road 97.
a
loaded onto a trailer, but the hitch is propped up on blocks instead of being attached to a towing vehicle.
Investigators are asking anyone with knowledge of the house's origins to contact the sheriff's office.
Photos shared by the sheriff's office show the home is
iAV - Antelope Valley Digital Magazine