Page 16 - IAV Digital Magazine #415
P. 16

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A Box Full of Kisses
Author Unknown
The story goes that some time ago, a man punished his 3-year-old daughter for wasting a roll of gold wrapping paper. Money was tight and he became infuriat- ed when the child tried to decorate a box to put under the Christmas tree. Nevertheless, the little girl brought the gift to her father the next morning and said, "This is for you, Daddy."
The man was embar- rassed by his earlier overreaction, but his anger flared again when he found out the box was empty. He yelled at her, stating, "Don't you know, when you give someone a present, there is supposed to be something inside? The little girl looked up at him with tears in her eyes and cried, "Oh, Daddy, it's not empty at all. I blew kisses into the box. They're all for you, Daddy."
The father was crushed. He put his arms around his little girl, and he begged for her forgive- ness.
Only a short time later, an accident took the life of the child. It is also told that her father kept that gold box by his bed for many years and, whenever he was dis- couraged, he would take out an imaginary kiss and remember the love
of the child who had put it there.
In a very real sense, each one of us, as humans beings, have been given a gold con- tainer filled with uncon- ditional love and kiss- es... from our children, family members, friends, and God. There is sim- ply no other possession, anyone could hold, more precious than this.
Having lost most of his hearing a number of years ago, this elderly man goes to the doctor to be fitted with hearing aids which promise to allow him to hear 100%.
A month later, he returns to the doctor for a check up on his progress. The doctor tells him that his hearing is perfect and asks if his family is pleased.
The man says, "Oh, I haven't told them about the hearing aids yet. I just sit around and listen to them talk. I've changed my will three times!"
Dear John,
I have been unable to sleep since I broke off our engagement. Won't you forgive and forget? Your absence is breaking my heart. I was a fool, nobody can take your place.
All my love, Belinda. xxxxoooxxxx
P.S. Congratulations on winning last week's Powerball lottery.
Two men sank into adja- cent train seats after a long day in the city. One asked the other, "Your son go back to college yet?"
"Two days ago."
"Hmm. Mine's a senior this year, so it's almost over. In May, he'll be an engineer. What's your boy going to be when he gets out of college?"
"At the rate he's going, I'd say he'll be about thir- ty."
"No, I mean what's he taking in college?"
"He's taking every penny I make."
"Doesn't he burn the midnight oil enough?"
"He doesn't get in early
enough to burn the mid- night oil."
"Well, has sending him to college done anything at all?"
"Sure has! It's totally cured his mother of brag- ging about him!"
Mr. and Mrs. Thorne had just reached the airport in the nick of time to catch the plane for their two-week's vacation in Majorca. "I wish we'd brought the piano with us," said Mr. Thorne.
"What on earth for?" asked his wife.
"I've left the tickets on it."
On the first day of Spring Training, a baseball scout brings a race horse with him to add to the starting line-up. The coach asks, "What did you bring that horse here for?"
The scout replies, "Wait until you see him bat."
All the players are laugh- ing, until the horse comes to bat. At this point, the horse grabs the bat, and everyone quiets down. They stare at the horse. The pitcher, just shrugs his shoul- ders, and throws the ball toward home plate when astonishingly the horse hits the ball deep in the outfield.
The horse just stands there and does not move. The manager then yells at the baseball scout to tell the horse to run to first base. The scout looks back at the manager and yells back, "If he could run, he'd be at Belmont!"
A husband and wife were at the mall when they got separated. The wife calls him on her cell phone. "Where are you?" she asks.
"Well, do you remember the store when we were first married and you were looking at a beauti-
ful ring in the jewelry store window, but we could not afford it?"
"Yes", she replies, excit- ed to think about what he was about to say, a tear forming in her eyes.
"Great, I am at the sports store right next to it."
Alfie had been listening to his sister practicing her singing. "Sis," he said, "I wish you'd sing Christmas Carols."
"That’s nice of you, Alfie," she said. "Why?"
"Then I'd only have to hear you once a year!"
A married couple was shopping at the super- market when the hus- band picked up a 12 pack of beer and put it in the cart.
"What do you think you're doing?" asked the wife.
"They're on sale for $10 for 12 cans," he explained.
"Put them back," she demanded. "We can't afford it."
A few aisles later, she picked up a $20 jar of face cream and put it in the cart.
"What do you think you're doing?" asked the husband indignantly.
"It's my face cream," she said. "It makes me look beautiful."
He said: "So do 12 cans of beer and they're half the price!"
A little girl asked her father, "Daddy? Do all Fairy Tales begin with Once Upon A Time?"
He replied, "No, there is a whole series of Fairy Tales that begin with 'If Elected I promise...'"
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