Page 17 - IAV Digital Magazine #486

iAV - Antelope Valley Digital Magazine
Why English Is Tough
Twenty-one rea- sons why English is hard to learn. 1. The bandage was wound around the wound.
2. The farm was used to produce produce.
3. The dump was so full it had to refuse more refuse.
4. We must polish the Polish furni- ture.
5. He could lead if he would get the lead out.
6. The soldier decided to desert his dessert in the desert.
7. Since there was no time like the present, he thought it was time to present the present.
8. A bass was painted on the head of the bass drum.
9. When shot at, the dove dove into the bushes.
10. I did not object to the object.
11. The insurance was invalid for the invalid.
12. There was a row among the oarsmen on how to row.
13. They were too close to the door to close it.
14. The buck does funny things when does are present.
15. A seamstress and a sewer fell down into a sewer line.
16. To help with planting, the farmer taught his sow to sow.
17. The wind was too strong to wind the sail.
18. After a num- ber of injections my jaw got num- ber.
19. Upon seeing the tear in the painting I shed a tear.
20. I had to sub- ject the subject to a series of tests.
Bill meets Doug shopping at the mall and sees he has a small gift wrapped box.
"It's my wife's birthday tomor- row." Doug said. "Last week I asked her what she wanted for
her birthday."
"And???" Bill asked.
"Well, she said 'Oh, I don't know just give me something with diamonds in it'."
"So what did you get her?" asked Bill.
"I bought her a deck of cards!!"
My wife is incredi- bly smart.
When I called her from my buddy’s phone she answered, “Hey love!”
She already knew it was me.
When I worked in the post office, a lady barged in and started com- plaining that she’d got home to find a note from the postman – he’d tried to deliver a package but nobody was in.
“My husband was home all day!” she fumed.
After I gave her the package, she said, “Oh, I’m so excited – it’s my husband’s new hearing aid!”
Bride Arrives Her Wedding In A Coffin Because She "Wanted To Be Different"
Video Here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E-4IKntW2UI
By Ishola Kolapo
An unidentified bride pulled quite a weird stunt at her wedding as she arrived her reception venue in a coffin.
The bride start- ed dancing immediately the coffin was opened to the amazement of
everyone who gathered to cel- ebrate with her on her big day. Some details of the wedding is still unclear at the time of filing this report. However recall that a 58-year- old bride, Jenny Buckleff pulled same stunt in 2018 by also showing up at her wedding in a coffin. She
said she did it because she wanted to be different.
Jenny said ‘I just wanted to do something a little bit differ- ent. Instead of turning up in a horse-drawn cart, I thought I’m going to turn up in a cof- fin.”
iAV - Antelope Valley Digital Magazine