Page 28 - FS-Grizzly Bear
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Additional Parent Material
This is an example of how to use the Emotional Signal Light in “Real World Situations:
Tommy, you are very upset right now. What signal light zone are you in? “The Red Light zone.” That’s right and when you are at a Red Light, you should stop and think about what you are telling yourself. Take a minute and think about it and I will get back to you.
Tommy what signal light zone are you in now? “The Yellow Light zone.” Excellent, now tell me what you were thinking when you were in the Red Zone. “I was mad because Billy called me a name but I knew you would not believe me.” Tommy, you remember our stories about coping don’t you? Is there really any reason to let yourself get upset about what Billy is doing? Do you really want to give Billy the ability to control you? “No .”
So tell me Tommy, now that you are in the Yellow Zone, what are you telling yourself? “I am thinking that Billy is just being mean and he does that a lot to me and others. Calling me a name does not make me that thing. I need to just ignore him so I don’t get in trouble.”
Tommy, that sounds like Good Thinking to me. You don’t have to like that Billy is calling you names. It is not nice, this name calling but if you ignore him, and Billy will stop it, because you are in control. I am very pleased with how well you worked that out in your head.
There are some behavioral modification techniques you can use with this and other stories.
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