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Worksheet
When others look or act differently, we frequent try to come up with reasons for their “difference.” If we have a habit of “thinking stinky,” we will come up with reasons that make them look bad or ourselves look better, “They think that they are better than us (teacher pet) and that is why they always make good grades.”
It is important for children to understand that others can be wrong (because of their Stinky Thinking) and that they will have Not OK emotions. In the case of Red Tail, they may feel angry.
When you choose “to be different,” even if your reasons are sound and rational, you can expect some to feel “threatened” and that will generate their anger. Typically, this Not OK emotion will lead to Thumbs Down behavior as demonstrated by Red Tail in the story.
It is difficult for children (and many adults) to give themselves permission to not take personal responsibility for the upset feelings and behaviors of others.
Help your children understand “You can’t control what others say or do. If you allow yourself to get upset because of the behavior of others, than you are giving them control over you.” You should not take responsibility for the Stinky Thinking of others and accept the reality that “Life is not fair.”
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