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CONCLUSION
The type of S nky Thinking illustrated in this story is at the core of most school di cul es. An inability to have pa ence and be persistent is a blueprint for failure in almost any setting.
It is not that a school class is too difficult. It is not that you can never learn it. The fact that you did poorly in a similar class last year does not mean that you can’t do well this year. But if you tell yourself those things (Stinky Thinking) they will all come true.
An important point in the “Cosmos Explains” is that “just not ac ng out” (Thumbs Down behavior because of your S nky Thinking, is not the goal of this story. You may not immediately get into trouble for your lack of pa ence or persistence and the frustra on and anger (Not OK emo ons) that your poor coping skills will cause but you will ul mately experience the nega ve consequences because you will not change your thinking.
The Exercise will help the children learn some coping self-messages. A de cit in coping self-messages is a signi cant handicap when it comes to being pa ent and persistent. Many of those who are impa ent and not persistent will not have these types of Good Thinking self-messages. In addi on, they will have di culty accep ng that they should have them and use them.
Rewarding behaviors associated with being pa ent and persistent should
be rela vely easy. The main thing about this is to be sure that the thinking associated with the pa ent or persistent behavior is ra onal, that is Good Thinking. Some of us maintain our persistence with Stinky Thinking, “I’ll keep doing this until I am the best in the class and then I’ll be able to make fun
of them.”
If you are in a classroom se ng, ask for a volunteer to tell about any opportunity that they had to deal with their desire to Want it now. Ask them, “What were the coping self-messages they used to be more pa ent or persistent? Has anyone no ced another child ac ng more pa ent or persistent?”
Because this a di cult issue to quan fy, you will be limited in your ability to recognize and reinforce the incremental progress that some children may make in their e orts to be more pa ent and persistent. This can be a slow process with frequent relapses so be prepared and understand that to help them become patient and persistent you also will have to be both patient and persistent.
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