Page 316 - WLMIG_6132004.indd

conscience and would speak to her as if it was another person. She had not hallucinated in the past, but considered this inner voice something that she should hear as a voice separate from her own self. She decided not to eat, sleep, or talk to anyone until she heard this voice. She silently sat in the ashram for over a day and finally got her wish. She began to hear a voice that she experienced as independent from herself, talking to her. When I was called to treat her, she was siing cross-legged and not responding to anyone except when they tried to remove her from the spot. She would then resist and be combative. It took five of us to get her to her room and use some sedation to quiet her. Friends watched her closely for three or four days while she was medicated, before she was grounded enough to get along by herself. She then understood that her inner voice was not to be experienced apart from herself, but was her own conscience telling her what is right and what is wrong.
Innocent and well-meaning devotees can become trapped and tortured by their minds, caught in the web of their own creation when they give up relying on their own conscience in favor of reading outer signs. Outer signs might be helpful if we use our conscience to interpret them. However, too many people want to depend on others for direction because they do not trust their conscience. Instead, they engage in wishful thinking that can get them into trouble.
People are especially prone to such problems when their personalities are stressed. For instance, aer traveling a long distance, experiencing jet lag, culture shock, eating poorly, and being sleep deprived, constitutions weaken. If further stressed by harsh, self-imposed practice, they might become delirious, confused, and even hallucinatory. It is dangerous to practice anything in a fanatical way. Our conscience is not something separate from ourselves but is our natural intuition and inclination that tells us what is right and what is wrong. For dharma to protect us, we must practice it with a clear, steady, discriminating conscience, and use good common sense.
316