Page 89 - Walking_The_Red_Road

When I was four or five years old, he taught
me how to skate and play hockey. Growing up
he taught me a lot. As a kid, I never knew my dad that well, because he wasn’t around that much. But my uncle was always around for my sister and me. He taught me how to hunt, skin a moose, pluck a goose, etc. The last time I went hunting with him I remember that we shot five ducks, 11 geese and three partridges and I got to tell you I had the most fun being with him out in the field about six or seven in the morning. Before we moved to North Bay, I lost my uncle. He was such a huge influence in my life. He inspired me to chase my dream and that was to play professional football. I remember one day, a week before he died, we were sitting out on the porch right around the time when the sun would set. He taught me how life is going to be like
and how hard it’s going to be when we get older. I was at that age where I would start thinking, “What the hell is this guy talking about?”
His death really affected me because I lost that one true person who was like an older brother to me and it changed me into a person I didn’t want to be. When I moved to North Bay, I began to fall into the wrong crowd. As soon as that happened, I began experimenting with alcohol and drugs. During my grade 8 year I was abusing my addiction every day. I was going to class drunk, high or even hung over. I spent that whole time thinking of my life like it was nothing but a huge party. But life has its consequences. It took quite a while to find out what it means to know when someone loves and cares about you. All I ever did was run away and hurt the people who did.
Then one day I nearly died. It dawned on me that it wasn’t the right thing to do because it hurt me emotionally, mentally, physically and spiritually. I didn’t only hurt myself though, I also hurt my family. The way I saw it was like I was down on the ground and I couldn’t get up. I mean, I was trying, but I couldn’t. One morning, I was sitting in my hospital bed and I looked out the window and I got a flashback of me and my uncle talking that week before he died. I finally understood what he meant.
What he meant was to be able to become a real person is when someone loves you, and as far
as I can tell, to take care of each other. To take care of our family and friends, first we must take care of ourselves. We live in a big world out there with enough pain and misery behind it that will take away everything from us. When I was sitting in that hospital bed it got me thinking that this wasn’t the life I wanted. So that’s when I decided enough is enough. June 21st of 2009 was the day I started taking care of myself better and whipped my life back into shape.
When I first started high school at Chippewa Secondary, that’s where I decided to start my football career. When I finished playing my second year with the Nipissing Wild football team, I was named one of the top three offensive linemen in Ontario. By the end of the season,
I was invited to the Jr. CIS football combine in Hamilton. Out of 27 offensive linemen from
other teams across Canada, I managed to finish the combine as the 2nd place MVP. Last year, I also won an award for Top Offensive lineman of the year. When I won that award I felt extremely proud and honoured on earning what I have been fighting for these past five years.
But it made me think of the one person who wasn’t there to celebrate with me: my uncle, because he was my inspiration. And now that it’s five years later, I love waking up every morning to see smiles on my family’s faces, letting me know that they’re happy I’m still around.
So in closing, I would like to say Chi-Meegwetch to all of you who took the time to listen to my uncle’s history and also mine. Thank you.
Walking the Red Road | REPORT OF THE URBAN ABORIGINAL COMMUNITIES THRIVE PROJECT | 89
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To take care of our family and friends, first we must take care of ourselves.
Steven Rickard