Page 152 - She's One Crazy Lady!

Bad days happ“
I’d got it in my head that to administer such toxic chemicals into patients must be the worst thing any medical professional could do – or should that be the best; their aim being for the drugs to destroy all the possible cancer cells in the body, without any guarantees and certainly no promises. To pump toxic chemicals into patients’ veins through cannulas, drips, tubes and syringes, at the right time, in the right order and at the right speed, offering yet more drugs to offset the feelings of sickness and to build up the immune system, always knowing that such cocktails, individually mixed for each patient, could make the patient quite ill, with nasty side-effects, is not the best of jobs for sure, but thank goodness we have such qualified and dedicated medical teams to do this, for they give patients ‘hope’ and we have to trust them. After all, what are the alternatives?
I’d read about chemotherapy – but ‘reading’ was not quite the same as ‘having’!
en to everyone but at the end of the day we should always be able to find one thing that makes us
Attending an initial appointment with an oncology registrar at the Centenary Wing at Kettering General Hospital I was asked if I would consider taking part in a Clinical Trial (TACT Trial) where I would be ‘randomised’ to have ‘standard’ drugs or be given a new drug on the market called ‘Taxtotere’, which now, like many other new drugs available, is widely used to treat a number of other cancers as well as breast cancer. Both options were explained to me, but a lot of what
the registrar said went over my head as it was quite technical. All I could remember was that, if chosen for the trial I would receive both standard drugs and the Taxotere; four sessions of the standard, followed by four Taxotere; if I wasn’t chosen, I would receive six sessions of the standard drugs. But I only had a day to think about it. Why the sudden rush? Believing in nothing ventured, nothing gained, I opted, in my mind, to agree to go on the trial and take my chances, looking up ‘Taxotere’ and the standard drugs on the internet. Not a good idea! The
smile or laug”
h.
Diary extract: October 11th 2001
“Well, I’ve known about this appointment for weeks and it’s finally here. I’ve been told I will be blasted with ‘aggressive’ chemotherapy so let’s find out what it’s all about...”
Marilyn had given me a card with the words: “Bad days happen to everyone but at the end of the day we should always be able to find one thing that makes us smile or laugh.” On the inside Marilyn had written: “And we sure will, kiddo!” She knew me. She knew I was feeling apprehensive.
152