Page 57 - ConvinceThemFlip

neutralize the fight-or-flight response
• Before I approached anyone, I adjusted my attitude. I
was curious, with a dash of playful. As I approached each
encounter, I recalled a time when I felt the combination
of curious and playful, and that got me in the mood (see
page 68 for more on this).
• As I approached each encounter, I said to myself, “Great,
great, great,” and that made me smile. (You can say it out
loud or in your head; the important thing is to get the
feeling. Just the word itself is upbeat and encouraging.)
• The minute I walked up, I took note of the color of the
person’s eyes.
• I turned my body as if to point my heart at the person’s
heart (for more on this, see page 72). This move dem-
onstrates open body language and an open heart.
• I let them see I had nothing threatening in my hands.
You don’t want to go triggering the fight-or-flight mecha-
nism. I carry an expensive-looking, closed fountain pen
in my hand as a prop. It’s the next best thing to a lab
coat, and its expensive look gives me an air of authority.
The fact that it’s closed means I’m probably not going to
write anything down (as in make a report).
• I asked a softening question as soon as I walked up.
In every case I said, “Excuse me, can I ask you a ques-
tion?” Then I asked my real question: “When you meet
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