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"Sometimes people with the least that is worth stealing are the most concerned with giving the appearance of having great treasures hidden away."
"Is that from the Bible?"
"No, it's from observation."
"So what do we do?"
"Your voice is too young," said Sister Carlotta. "I'll work the phone."
She talked her way to the head registrar of the university. "He was a very nice boy to carry all my things after the wheel broke on my cart, and if these keys are his I want to get them back to him right away, before he worries.... No I will not drop them in the mail, how would that be 'right away'? Nor will I leave them with you, they might not be his, and then what would I do? If they are his keys, he will be very glad you told me where his classes are, and if they aren't his keys, then what harm will it cause? ... All right, I'll wait."
Sister Carlotta lay back on the bed. Bean laughed at her. "How did a nun get so good at lying?"
She held down the MUTE button. "It isn't lying to tell a bureaucrat whatever story it takes to get him to do his job properly."
"But if he does his job properly, he won't give you any information about Peter."
"If he does his job properly, he'll understand the purpose of the rules and therefore know when it is appropriate to make exceptions."
"People who understand the purpose of the rules don't become bureaucrats," said Bean. "That's something we learned really fast in Battle School."
"Exactly," said Carlotta. "So I have to tell him the story that will help him overcome his handicap." Abruptly she refocused her attention on the phone. "Oh, how very nice. Well, that's fine. I'll see him there."
She hung up the phone and laughed. "Well, after all that, the registrar emailed him. His desk was connected, he admitted that he had lost his keys, and he wants to meet the nice old lady at Yum- Yum."
"What is that?" asked Bean.
"I haven't the slightest idea, but the way she said it, I figured that if I were an old lady living near campus, I'd already know." She was already deep in the city directory. "Oh, it's a restaurant near campus. Well, this is it. Let's go meet the boy who would be king."
"Wait a minute," said Bean. "We can't go straight there."