Page 305 - English - Teaching Academic Esl Writing

COHESION ANDCOHERENCE 291
(4) Un-Parallel Adjectives—Noun Noun Modifiers and Linking/be-verbs— Activity Verbs
Sentence (4) contains two different parallelism errors: Adjective noun modifiers do not form very good parallels to noun modifiers that are nouns. In addition, linking and fo-verbs, which often involve predicative adjectives (see chap. 4), do not get along with activityverbs (e.g., read, write, measure}:
*In urban and high-expense settings, a proper treatment ofwastewater isnecessary and preserve a healthy environment.
The adjective urban is not parallel to the noun phrase high-expense, which can become highly expensive (or simply expensive). Similarly, the predicative adjective necessary does not match the verb preserve, nor does the first linking verb is_(necessary) form a good parallel to the second activ- ity verb preserve (a healthy environment). In this case, the second predicate phrase may need to be rewritten as infor thepreservation of a healthyenviron- ment or topreserve a healthy environment without the conjunction and. In ei- ther variant, the meaning may be slightly different from that originally intended by the writer.
(5) Un-Parallel Comparisons
One of the most confusing and difficult types of errors with the parallel structure entails faulty parallelism in complex comparisons in two con- joined sentences with omitted elements (see also chap. 4). The choice of which elements to omit, which to retain, and which to replace can cause a va-
riety of problems:
a) *The precipitation rates in Portland are lower than Seattle.
b)*Theconventionaltreatmentofwastewater ismoreexpensivethanmechani- cal equipment.
c) *Math teaching in Japan is more than the U.S.
In all these constructions, the necessary parallel (or replacement) ele- ments have been omitted (i.e., the subject noun those/that + the preposition in or bymeans of; see the followingcomplex prepositions):
a) The precipitation rates in Portland are lower than [those] [in] Seattle.
b) The conventional treatment ofwastewater is more expensive than [that] [by means of] mechanical equipment.
c) Math teaching in Japan is more [intensive/thorough] / [better] than [that] [in] the U.S.
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