Page 75 - The Ultimate Guidebook for Teens with Food Allergies

More than a Kiss, by Tess
When I was dating my high school boyfriend, we definitely had more than a few mix-ups with my allergies. One evening, when we were watching a movie, he kissed me after eating one of my allergens in a snack that he prepared and ate in another room. After a few minutes, my face became extremely itchy and I ran to the bathroom to discover that I was covered in hives. As the symptoms progressed, I made the decision to use my auto-injector and was taken to the hospital. It was a really difficult and awkward conversation to have afterward, especially because we were both teenagers at the time. I had to stress how important it was to communicate what he ate when we were going to be together. At first it felt like asking too much but, when I thought about it, I came to the conclusion that, if he wants to kiss me, he's going to have to figure out what's more important—the snack or being able to kiss me. In my current relationship, we are older and I'm more comfortable about setting out the rules. It has become second nature. Good communication is vital when you are sharing your life with another person. And, when you add in a food allergy, it is of SUPREME IMPORTANCE!
The “Allergy Talk”, by Talia
Chris and I had been dating for a few weeks when I decided to have “the allergy talk” with him. I explained to him that I had to avoid certain foods and that even small traces of an allergen could result in a severe reaction. He told me I was overreacting and being a bit neurotic. Hearing him say that really hurt me, because it took a lot of courage to talk about my allergies with him. I really liked him, so I pushed the conversation to the back of my head and moved on.
A few months later, we went on a trip to Spain together. Needless to say, eating out with him was a challenge. He wanted to try crazy new foods. But, because of the language barrier and the scarcity of emergency medical services (we were visiting small beach towns), I stuck to basics. He couldn’t understand why I wouldn’t try new things and constantly pressured me to eat foods I wasn’t comfortable with. One night, during dinner, he used his fork to try some of the spaghetti on my plate. I freaked out. I didn’t know the ingredients in his meal and he had just contaminated mine. We broke up a few weeks later for different reasons.
What did I learn from all this? Most importantly, no matter how cute a guy is, if he doesn’t take your allergies seriously, he is not the right guy for you. You deserve better. There are some amazing, caring guys out there who will understand your needs and be there for you no matter what. My current boyfriend understands perfectly and even carries my auto-injectors for me when my purse is full. I think the moral of the story is to not settle for a toad when your prince could be right around the corner.
Quick Tip - When you become close with someone, you can really use it to your advantage with food allergies. They can be an extra set of eyes to read labels, a second opinion on an “iffy” dessert, and another helper to remind you to bring you auto-injector. Involve them early and often and it can actually make your life easier.