Page 21 - October 2015

FR. DAN BRANDT
RICHARD LIS MEMORIAL SCHOLARSHIP
Complete this application to be eligible for the annual Chicago Lodge #7 scholarship drawing given in honor of our late State Lodge President, Richard Lis.
At the Nov. 17 General Meeting, 20 names will be drawn and awarded $1,000 scholarships. (We will draw five additional names in case some of the winners are not in college or elect not to continue their education.)
All applications are to be filled out and mailed to: FOP, Chicago Lodge #7, 1412 West Washington Boulevard, Chicago, IL 60607-1821.
Attention: Scholarship Committee.
The following rules apply:
• Scholarships are available to the sons and daughters (including stepchildren) of members of Lodge 7, who will be attending a college or trade
school for the first semester of the school year.
• The college attended must be recognized by the North Central Accrediting Association, or the trade school must be recognized by the Illinois
Department of Registration.
• Payment will be made at the January General Meeting after proof of attendance is received by the Scholarship Committee.
• Only one application per eligible child will be accepted.
• Applications may be submitted up to the time of the drawing.
APPLICANT’S NAME:
MEMBER’S NAME: MEMBER’S PHONE:
CITY, STATE, ZIP: RELATIONSHIP TO APPLICANT:
UNIT# OR RTD: MEMBER’S ADDRESS:
COLLEGE OR TRADE SCHOOL:
STAR #:
Our strength in handling the grief
FATHER DAN BRANDT’S CORNER
It was great to see so many familiar faces in September at the South Side Blue Mass at St. Cajetan and at the North Side comedy club, “The Laugh Factory,” for our sold-out “Funniest Cop in Chicago” competition. These happy occasions helped to balance some of the grief we as a police family experienced during previous weeks, burying several of our own members and spouses in an untimely manner.
It was also wonderful to see the hundreds and hun- dreds who gathered at Gold Star Families Memorial and Park to pay tribute to the 574 officers taken from us in the performance of their duties over the years.
We remember these fallen heroes at our regular Police Mass. In addition to our usual 11 a.m. Police Mass every second and fourth Sunday of each month at Mercy Home, next month we’ll also celebrate a special Thanksgiving Day Mass on Nov. 26 at 10 a.m. (Please note the adjust- ment in time for the holiday.) No matter your faith tradition, you are most welcome to attend. On-duty worshippers will be out as usual in less than 30
minutes.
I received an email recently from a detective in Area North, mentioning
his need to find something compassionate (but not trite) to say to parents who have lost children to violence, accidents, suicides, etc. In answering him, I realized such advice might help others in the department, as well.
Here are some helpful things you can say:
• I am very sorry for your loss.
• Is there a family pastor or familiar member of the clergy I can
contact for you?
And here are some things that are not helpful and should be avoided:
• Don't cry.
• It was his/her time.
• It must have been for the best.
• He/she is in a better place.
• I would die if I were you.
• God never gives us more than we can handle.
• Don't worry, things will be OK.
• Time is a great healer.
• Hang in there.
• God must have needed another angel in heaven.
• I know how you're feeling. (The only time you might use this is if
you have personally experienced what they are going through and
are comfortable sharing with them.)
You will notice the “Don't say” list is a lot longer than the “Do say” list.
That's because when in doubt, saying nothing at all will prove more ben- eficial than making a trite, overused or insensitive statement. Your silent presence speaks volumes. Trust me, in my years of public ministry I have learned this the hard way...on a few occasions wanting to place my foot in someone's mouth, even my own.
When leaving, if you're comfortable with it, something like this might be appreciated: “Again, I'm very sorry. I will keep your family in my prayers.” (If you use this one, then please be sure to make good on it in your personal prayers!)
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CHICAGO LODGE 7 ■ OCTOBER 2015
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While perhaps you're not ministers, and you have a job to do in short time with limited resources, it never hurts to show some compassion when dealing with grieving families. For more tips, please visit the "Resources and Outreaches" page on our website.
God bless you and your most noble work! d Fr. Dan Brandt
FR. DAN BRANDT, CPD Chaplain
Police Chaplains Ministry invites you and your family to our regular Sun- day Mass, the second and fourth Sunday of each month at 11 a.m. (except Chicago Marathon Sunday) at Crucifixion Chapel located at Mercy Home for Boys and Girls, 1140 W. Jackson Blvd.