Page 56 - Headingtonian Magazine 2017

first aid in practice. These types of experiences clearly developed an interest in nursing.
The Second World War was to cause a major change in family life when her father enlisted. The family spent time on a number of army bases and travelling to Hampshire to stay with her paternal grandparents. Daphne remembered long journeys in small cars; sometimes hidden in an army staff car driven by her father (against the rules!).
In September 1944, Daphne became a
boarder in Davenport where she made many longstanding school friends. She excelled
in sport and gained ‘colours’ for Hockey and Tennis. Music was her other love. She reached a high level in both piano and the organ.
She felt that she had not done too well at School Certificate and that it would not be sufficient to get onto a nursing training course. So in 1950 she started a two-year nursery nurse training course at St Christopher’s.
Due to her strong personal qualities, Daphne was offered a place at the Nursing Training School in 1952. She became a State Registered Nurse in 1955 and then achieved her Nightingale Badge in 1956. Then for two years she went up to Lancashire to become a State Registered Midwife in early 1958. By autumn that year, she was back at St Thomas’ to be a Night Sister at their Hydestile centre; and then
a Ward Sister in November 1960 (at only the
age of 29). By early 1966 she had been made Assistant Matron at their London Hospital. This would begin the life-long attachment with St Thomas’ Hospital in London and the Nightingale Fellowship, but most importantly the people and staff within them.
It was at St Thomas’ that Daphne met her husband Peter. They were married in 1968 at St. Mary’s Church, Lambeth, which is now the Garden Museum. They had no children but Daphne was a most loving and caring aunt to her six nephews and nieces, along with the many godchildren, who all loved coming to the Kennington house and being treated to endless
visits to zoos, museums and theatres. Even in her latter years she kept a drawer of toys, which the next generation of young children rushed down to explore and scatter.
Peter’s tragic passing in 1983 left Daphne a widow at only 52 and her heartbroken response was initially to throw herself further into her nursing work. Eventually she began to come
to terms with her grief, with particular support from close friends, and, two years after Peter’s death, she took sabbatical leave to visit her sister Jenny in New Zealand and studied epilepsy, the condition from which Peter suffered.
Returning to London, she still faced the challenge of adjusting to her new life but she was soon becoming heavily involved again in the life of St Thomas’, as well as wider interests outside. During this time she made many contacts in so many different contexts – she had a list of Christmas cards which at one stage exceeded 200.
Daphne had a deep interest in music. She was given a grand piano for her 21st birthday and loved playing the organ in the chapel. She spent many years ushering at both the Wigmore Hall and the Festival Hall. She also had a strong interest in gardening with many visits to the Chelsea Physic Garden, the Chelsea Flower Show, and many gardens around the country. In her retirement she also began volunteering at the Museum of Garden History, which took over the premises at St. Mary’s Church. This, alongside her involvement with the Florence Nightingale Museum and the Friends of St Thomas, amongst other volunteering, meant that she always seemed to be constantly serving.
Her volunteering was officially recognised in 2005 when she was amongst the 277 individuals to receive a medal for the ‘Year of the Volunteer’ at a ceremony at the Guildhall. This seems a particularly apt recognition for Daphne.
More than anything, though, we shall remember her as a deeply caring person who selflessly helped others in many different ways. We have
been greatly moved by how many people have recounted what Daphne did for them and it is incredible to think how many lives she seemed to touch.
She was a genuinely wonderful individual and she will be greatly missed.
Ann Stileman
Ann Stileman, who died on 2nd July 2016 aged 92, was born on 7th December 1923, the only daughter of Douglas and Daisy Stileman; her father was the Headmaster of Burford Grammar School.
From Headington School she went up to
Lady Margaret Hall, Oxford, in 1941 to read Modern History but in 1942 she left to do war work as a linguist (German) with the Foreign Office in London. Returning to LMH in 1945 she graduated with a Second Class in the Final Honours School of Modern History in 1947. She then worked for GCHQ including a two year tour at the British Embassy in Washington, USA, but like so many of her generation she never spoke about this, or her war work, even when it became permissible to do so.
Returning to the UK in 1954, she then embarked on a long, successful and fulfilling career in personnel management and training firstly with the Bristol Aeroplane Company (where from 1960 -1966 she was Registrar of their Technical College) and then with Tube Investments. She was a member of the Institute of Personnel Management.
In retirement she travelled widely and
pursued her interests in history, family history and exploring Saxon churches. In 1988 she completed an MPhil at Birmingham University’s Centre for Byzantine, Ottoman and Modern Greek Studies. She also served on the district committee of the National Council for The Single Woman and her Dependents.
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