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a bit down one of the first things they ask you to do is a gratitude journal. Write three things that you are grateful for, for the next 21 days. Did you know that if you do that, you increase your positive emotion by at least 20%?
Many of us never pause and realise what we have. One of my childhood dreams was to have a house with a balcony. I thought this would make me happy. I vowed that once I got it, I would always have coffee on the balcony because for me that symbolised success and tranquility.
I bought the house with a balcony. I enjoyed it for about three weeks then I forgot it because I was chasing other things.
Gratitude allows you to pause and smell the coffee, increasing your positive emotion.
The second psychological concept is capitalisation. When you have good news, whether at work or in your personal life and share it with others, two things happen. You intensify and sustain that feeling of happiness and when friends and partners tell you their good news, you are attentive because they are trying to capitalise. Be a proper audience. Don’t be that person that says, “Me too - let me tell you when I did it.’ When you do that you are interrupting the process of capitalisation.
The third way of lifting your positive emotion is behavioural expression. This concept proposes that when you feel good and express how good you feel you feel even better. Many of us don’t do this because we feel that we may come across as over dramatic. Of course, one should not be melodramatic, but it’s very important to acknowledge good feelings. Make sure that you capitalise on them.
Step 4 is the art of self-congratulation. Many people would rather self-deprecate than self-congratulate. Sometimes you must look at that mirror and say “I have come so far, congrats”.
Number 5 is building memories and capitalising on
them. When you look at pictures or memorabilia from when you were enjoying yourself, you access the same positive emotion that you felt at the time.
Never move on too quickly, take those pictures, it is fine. Some of you are pretending that that balcony is not nice. Did you go out? That is the view of Durban.
The last step is the art of being fully present when you do something. Many of us are always distracted.
So, ‘P’ is for positive emotion. Even as we go on with our work it is important to cultivate it.
‘E’ stands for engagement which psychologists call a state of flow. It occurs when you are working on something you enjoy so much that you lose track of time. Many people no longer get into that state at work. I have a few suggestions for how you do so.
During the COVID-19 pandemic we missed having good conversations with colleagues that can get you in that state of engagement and flow.
But, a work task can also get you there.
The third element of PERMA that helps us work well is positive relationships. As human beings we are made to belong. You can’t get that on MS Teams. We can capitalise on being at the office and have a human connection with other people.
Many of us have not had conversations in a long time and we have become quite rusty. When we return to work, PERMA can help us with authentic happiness. It is impossible to be authentically happy if you don’t have social connections, no matter how many.
The 4th element of PERMA is meaning. People who have jobs and enjoy them need to remind themselves why they do what they do.
Meaning gives one a sense of transcendence, that I am working for something much bigger than a paycheck. It will make you more fulfilled at work and you will have more energy.
Remind yourself why you do what you do, particularly
when you have that document. Remind yourself that this is not just an application, it is a person’s dream. There is another Siphiwe Moyo who could be speaking at a conference who is applying here. It’s not just the person. When I submitted my application, I was the only one that was going to university. My family has enjoyed upward mobility mainly because of me. When you approve that application, you are changing lives. It is not just paper; it is human beings. It is the dreams of families and villages. It is the dream of someone in the village where no one has attended university.
As applications practitioners, remember why you started, remember there are people who did not have access and now have access because of you. There are people who never had an education and now have one. So, there is a sense of meaning in what you are doing and if you think about it, if you remember that you are helping people psychologically it helps you to get energy.
The ‘A’ in PERMA is a sense of accomplishment. But, things will never happen until you make them happen.
I will never forget this picture. I used to stay in Orange farm. It is an informal settlement and every day I used to take the same 4:30 train number 9003 at Straatfort station. On 4 July 2002, I was standing at that train station waiting for the train as usual. I had woken up at 3 o’ clock to catch that train to university and to work. I remember on that day, a friend waiting for the same train said to me, “You know what Siphiwe, this thing of waking up at 3am and taking trains must stop. We must also work hard and get out of this informal settlement. Surely there are better lives out there. Surely we can buy ourselves cars and houses like other people?”
I went back to Orange Farm in 2015 and found that my friend is still travelling on that same train, 13 years later. I asked him what happened to our dreams, and he said: “You know what Siphiwe, it is the system. The system has marginalised us and ostracised us’. And I cannot