Page 17 - IAV Digital Magazine #566

iAV - Antelope Valley Digital Magazine
A mother was driving home from the shops when she decided to stop by at her son and daughter-in- law’s house.
She knocked on the door, there was no answer. She tried the door, which was unlocked, so she decided to walk in.
She was shocked to see her daugh- ter-in-law, lying on the couch, totally naked.
Soft music was playing and the aroma of scented candles filled the room.
“What on earth are you doing?” she asked her daughter-in-law.
“I’m waiting for Robbie to come home from work”, the daughter-in- law answered.
“But you are lying there naked!” the mother-in-law exclaimed.
“This is my love dress”, her daugh- ter-in-law explained.
“Love dress? But you’re naked!”
“Robbie loves me to wear this
dress”, she explained.
“Every time he sees me like this, he instantly becomes aroused and ravages me for hours”.
The mother-in-law blushed and left. She had obviously been doing some thinking on the drive home, because when she got home, she undressed, showered, put on her best perfume, dimmed the lights, put on a romantic CD and lay on the couch waiting for her husband to arrive.
Finally, her hus- band came home from work.
He walked in and did a double take, seeing her lying there so provoca- tively.
“What on earth are you doing Hilda?” he asked.
“This is my love dress”, she whis- pered sensually.
“Your love dress needs ironing”, her husband said.
“What’s for din- ner?”
After a long night of making love,
Ben rolled over, pulled out a ciga- rette from his jeans and searched for his lighter.
Unable to find it, he asked Penny if she had one at hand.
“There might be some matches in the top drawer,” she replied.
He opened the drawer of the bed- side table and found a box of matches sitting neatly on top of a framed picture of another man.
Naturally, the guy began to worry.
“Is this your hus- band?” he inquired nervous- ly.
“No, silly,” she replied, snuggling up to him.
“Your boyfriend then?” he asked.
“No, not at all,” she said, nibbling away at his ear.
“Well, who is he then?” demanded the bewildered guy.
Calmly, Penny replied,
“That’s me before the operation.”
Arkansas Man Finds 3.29-carat Gem At Crater Of Diamonds
By Ben Hooper
March 15 (UPI) - - Arkansas State Parks said a visi- tor to Crater of Diamonds State Park recently unearthed a 3.29-carat brown diamond, the largest found at the park since September 2021.
Officials wrote in a news
release that Davi d Anderson of Murfreesboro was wet-sifting soil from the park's West
Drain area when he spotted something shiny.
"At first I thought it was quartz but wondered why it was so shiny," Anderson told park officials. "Once I picked it up, I realized it was a diamond!"
Anderson said he has been a frequent visitor to the park during the past 16 years and has found more than 400 diamonds, including a 6.19-
carat white dia- mond in April 2014.
Anderson dubbed his latest discovery "B.U.D."
"That's for 'Big, Ugly Diamond,'" he said.
Officials said Anderson's dia- mond is the largest discovery at the park
since a 4.38- carat yellow dia- mond was dis- covered in September 2021.
iAV - Antelope Valley Digital Magazine