Page 17 - IAV Digital Magazine #543

iAV - Antelope Valley Digital Magazine
As a woman passes her daughter’s closed bedroom door she heard a strange buzzing noise coming from inside.
Opening the door, she saw her daughter with a vibrator.
Shocked, she asked: ‘what in the world are you doing?’
The daughter replied:
‘ Mum, I’m thirty- five years old, unmarried, and this thing is about as close as I’ll ever get to a hus- band. Please, go away and leave me alone.’
The next day, the girl’s father heard the same buzz coming from the other side of the closed bedroom door.
Upon entering the room, he saw his daughter making passionate love to her vibrator.
He asked her what she was doing,
The daughter said:
‘ Dad I’m thirty- five, unmarried, and this thing is about as close as I’ll ever get to a husband. Please, go away and leave me alone.’ A couple of days later, the wife came home from a shopping trip, placed the gro- ceries on the kitchen counter, and heard that buzzing noise coming from, of all places, the liv- ing room.
When she went in she saw her hus- band sitting on the couch, down- ing a cold beer, and staring at the TV.
The vibrator was next to him on the couch, buzzing like crazy.
The wife asked: ‘What the heck are you doing?’ To which the hus- band replied: ‘I’m watching football with my son-in- law.’
A man joins a soccer team and his new team- mates inform him, “At your first team dinner as the new guy, you will have
to give us a talk about sex.”
The evening arrives and he gives a detailed, humorous account of his sex life. When he got home, his wife asked how the evening went and not wanting to lie, but also not want- ing to explain exactly what hap- pened, he said, “Oh, I had to make a talk about yachting,” his wife thought this a little peculiar but said nothing more and went to sleep.
The next day she bumped into one of his new team- mates at the supermarket and asked, “I heard my husband had to make a speech last night. How did it go?” His mate said smiling, ‘Oh, it was excel- lent! Your hus- band is clearly very experi- enced!.”
The wife looked confused and replied to his mate, “Strange, he has only done it twice and the second time he was sick.”
Japanese Teacher Suspended After Being Caught Using Colleague’s Toothbrush More Than 20 Times
The prefectural board of educa- tion announced on March 16 that a 51-year-old teacher at a pub- lic junior high school in Shunan, Yamaguchi Prefecture, had been suspended for three months for repeated inappropriate behavior, includ- ing “impulsively” putting his col- league’s tooth- brush into his mouth about 20 times.
According to the
education board, the instructor vis- ited a school nurse’s office 30 times without authorization between early September and late November in 2021, each time at roughly 5 a.m. He went through the room’s desk and drawers, putting the nurs- ing teacher’s toothbrush in his mouth around 20 times.
The school nurse noticed some- thing was wrong, including the wet
toothbrush, and set up a video camera in the sickroom, which captured the male teacher’s inappropriate behavior multiple times.
The teacher was quoted as say- ing, “I got carried away with an impulse to put someone’s tooth- brush into my mouth. I felt close to the nursing teacher.” The suspension was issued on March 16.
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