Page 17 - IAV Digital Magazine #598

iAV - Antelope Valley Digital Magazine
Police: HOV Lane Driver's Passenger Was A Dummy Head
By Ben Hooper
July 16 (UPI) -- The Washington State Patrol said a driver polled over for speeding in the high- occupancy vehicle lanes had a surprise in her back seat -- her passenger was a mannequin bust.
The WSP said on social media that a trooper stopped the car on south- bound Interstate 5, near South 272nd Street, for going 80 mph in a 60 mph zone.
Officials said the woman was traveling in the HOV lane, but her only passen- ger turned out to be a mannequin bust propped up on a cooler and dis- guised with a jacket.
"The driver said this is her training aid and the reason it was positioned this way was to properly dry the hair," the WSP wrote.
The driver was released with a speeding ticket.
Hearing his wife as she sings, the husband says, "You know dear, when you sing like that I just wish you were on the radio."
The wife smiles and replies, "Wow honey, you think I am that good?"
"No, but at least that way I can change the sta- tion or turn it off."
One night, a lady stumbled into the police station with a black eye. She claimed she heard a noise in her backyard and went to investi- gate. The next thing she knew she was hit in the eye and knocked out cold.
An officer was sent to her house to investigate and he returned 1-1/2 hours later with a black eye.
"Did you get hit by the same per- son?" his captain asked.
"No," he replied. "I stepped on the same rake."
She entered the office of a noted divorce lawyer. "I want to know if I have grounds for divorce? "she
asked.
"Are you mar- ried?" asked the lawyer.
"Yes, I am."
"Then, "he replied, "you have ground."
At 8 p.m. one night, a pilot who had run out of fuel made an emergency land- ing at a top secret government base. He was quickly surrounded by security and taken inside to be interrogated. The interrogation was grueling because they wanted to make sure it was an unplanned landing and he was not a spy.
The interrogation lasted all night. At 6 a.m. they refu- eled his plane and let him go with his promise never to return. Four hours later he returned and landed again. Security met him on the runway. They asked him why he had come back.
"I know I prom- ised never to return but I brought my wife and now you have to tell her where I was all
night..."
A new hair salon opened up for business right across the street from the old established hair cutters' place.
They put up a big bold sign which read: "WE GIVE SEVEN DOLLAR HAIR CUTS!"
Not to be out- done, the old Master Barber put up his own sign: "WE FIX SEVEN DOLLAR HAIR CUTS!"
Teacher: "Which is the best month to study?"
Student: "Octembruary."
Teacher: "Don't be silly. There's no month like that."
Student: "Exactly...."
The warehouse foreman walked up on a worker and caught him napping.
"Hey!" the fore- man shouted. "Why aren't you working?"
"Because I didn't see you coming."
iAV - Antelope Valley Digital Magazine