Page 8 - IAV Digital Magazine #586

iAV - Antelope Valley Digital Magazine
Australian Woman Wins 'World's Ugliest Lawn' Competition
Chinese Chess Player Lost His Title After Defecating In A Bathtub
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tBq8fi5f1XA
Xianqi is 2500 years old and its rules are clearly inspired by chess, although they have a different com- plexity. Certainly, it didn’t deserve a winner like Yan Chenglong, 48 years old, who defeated his rivals, pocketed the money, went out to drink and celebrate... And, upon returning to the hotel, he decided to defe- cate in the bathtub.
The hotel managers saw it and alerted the authorities, although in itself it was not something that could dis- qualify a player. Disgusting? Yes. Illegal? Not so much. But things get complicated because inside their, ahem, “gift”, the hotel says
they found a remote-con- trolled anal massage device. And if you follow chess news, this is not news to you.
According to several people who watched the champi- onship, Chenglong twisted rhythmically while playing
the game. Why? Apparently, to send data about the game to
a computer that returned the solutions in the form of anal vibrations. Of course, for many reasons, he has denied the accusations, giv- ing a weighty reason to relieve himself in the bath- tub instead of the toilet, like everyone else: he didn’t make it on time. Euh.
The Chinese Xianqi Association has stated that there is no way to know for sure if he used anal mas- sagers to cheat, but his actions “damaged the hotel property, violated public order and good morals, had a negative impact on the competition and the Xiangqi event, and was characteris- tic of a bad person.” He had to return the champion belt, part of his winnings, and accept being disqualified from any championship for the next year. Next time he will think twice before mov- ing that particular piece.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Rilhhe5SYJs
By Ben Hooper
Jan. 11 (UPI) -
- An Australian woman's bandi- coot-ravaged yard was dubbed the winner of the first-ever World's Ugliest Lawn competition.
Kathleen Murray of Sandford, Tasmania, was named the
winner of the contest, which was organized by the town of Gotland, Sweden.
Gotland started the contest two years ago to encourage locals to conserve water amid a near-dis- astrous drought in the town, and this year the con-
test went global, with lawns in the United States, Canada, Britain, Germany, France and Croatia com- peting for unaes- thetic honors.
Murray's lawn features sparse patches of yellow grass, shriveled plants and dry divots caused by the local bandi- coots.
"The bandicoots love digging -- that's how they find their favorite food. Now my back yard looks like a real-life Hungry Hungry Hippo game. I also have an echidna that helps, and some chooks,"
Murray told The Guardian.
Murray was awarded with a "pre-owned" T- shirt bearing the phrase: "Proud owner of the World's Ugliest Lawn."
"I used to think the bandicoots were wildlife of mass destruction invading my lawn, but now I see that they've actually liberated me from ever having to mow it again," Murray said. "I'm all for guilt-free weekends, espe- cially since my ex-husband left with the lawn- mower back in 2016."
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