Page 17 - IAV Digital Magazine #551

iAV - Antelope Valley Digital Magazine
A cowboy rode into town and stopped at a saloon for a drink.
Unfortunately, the locals always had a habit of picking on strangers, which he was.
When he finished his drink, he found his horse had been stolen.
He went back into the bar, handily flipped his gun into the air, caught it above his head without even looking and fired a shot into the ceiling.
“Which one of you sidewinders stole my horse?!” he yelled with sur- prising forceful- ness.
No one answered
“Alright, I’m gonna have another beer, and if my horse ain’t back outside by the time I finish, I’m gonna do what I dun in Texas! And I don’t like to have to do what I dun in Texas!”
Some of the locals shifted rest- lessly.
The man, true to his word, had another beer, walked outside, and his horse has
been returned to the post.
He saddled up and started to ride out of town.
The bartender wandered out of the bar and asked, “Say part- ner, before you go... what hap- pened in Texas?”
The cowboy turned back and said,...
“I had to walk home.”
One evening a man was at home watching TV and eating peanuts. He’d toss them in the air, then catch them in his mouth.
In the middle of catching one, his wife asked a question, and as he turned to answer her, a peanut fell in his ear.
He tried and tried to dig it out but succeeded in only pushing it in deeper.
He called his wife for assistance, and after hours of trying they became worried and decided to go to the hospital.
As they were ready to go out the door, their
daughter came home with her date.
After being informed of the problem, their daughter’s date said he could get the peanut out.
The young man told the father to sit down, then shoved two fin- gers up the father’s nose and told him to blowhard.
When the father blew, the peanut flew out.
The mother and daughter jumped and yelled for joy.
The young man insisted that it was nothing and the daughter brought the young man out to the kitchen for some- thing to eat.
Once he was gone the mother turned to the father.
The mother said,
“That’s wonderful. Isn’t he smart? What do you think he’s going to be when he grows older?!”
The father replies
“From the smell of his fingers, our son-in-law!”
Four Women Set World Record For Rowing From California To Hawaii
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IYP2Y3B9yfI
By Ben Hooper
July 27 (UPI) -
- An all-female rowing team broke a world record by rowing more than 2,400 nautical miles from California to Hawaii in 34 days, 14 hours and 11 minutes.
Libby Costello, Sophia Denison- Johnston, Brooke Downes and Adrienne Smith, also known as the Lat35 crew, set off from San Francisco in June and arrived
in Honolulu on Tuesday morn- ing.
The four-woman team set a world record for the fastest time to make the journey unassisted for an all-female team.
"I think some- thing that I want people to take away is that these women are so incredible but we're not super- human. There's nothing that we were born with that makes us any different than anybody
else,"
Downes told Goo d Morning America after arriving in Hawaii.
The team's jour- ney raised money for the Anxiety and Depression Association of America.
A four-man team rowed from San Francisco to Honolulu in 30 days, 7 hours and 30 minutes in 2021, setting the male version of the record.
iAV - Antelope Valley Digital Magazine