Page 17 - IAV Digital Magazine #563

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Two couples were playing cards.
Jeff accidentally dropped some cards on the floor.
When he bent down under the table to pick them up, he noticed that Dave’s wife, Sandy, was not wearing any underwear!
Shocked by this, Jeff hit his head on the table and emerged red- faced.
Later when Jeff went to the kitchen to get some refresh- ments Sandy fol- lowed him and asked, “Did you see anything under the table that you liked?”
Jeff admitted, “Well, yes I did.”
She said “you can have it, but it will cost you $100.”
After a minute or two, Jeff indicates that he is interest- ed.
She tells him that since Dave works Friday afternoons and Jeff doesn’t, that Jeff should come to their house around 2:00 PM on Friday.
Friday came and
Jeff went to her house at 2:00 PM.
After paying her the $100, they went to the bed- room, had make love for a few hours and then Jeff left.
Dave came home about 6:00 PM and asked his wife,
“Did Jeff come by this afternoon?”
Totally shocked, Sandy replied, “Yes, he did stop by for a few min- utes.”
Next Dave asked, “Did Jeff give you $100?”
Sandy thought, ‘Oh hell, he knows!’ Reluctantly she said, “Yes, he did give me $100.”
“Good,” Dave says.
“Jeff came by the office this morning and borrowed the $100 from me and said that he’d stop by our house on his way home and pay me back. It’s so good to have a friend you can trust.”
A man and his wife were having an argument in bed. He finally jumped up and
took a blanket to the couch.
The next day the wife feeling bad about what hap- pened decided to buy her husband a gift, and since he was an avid golfer she went to the pro shop where he usually played golf. She talked with the pro and he suggested a putter and he showed her one of his finest.
How much is it?” she asked.
“One hundred and fifty pounds,” he replied.
She felt that was kind of expensive and told him so.
“But it comes with an inscription,” he said.
“What kind of inscription?” she asked..
“Whatever you wish,” he explained, “but one of the old golfers favorites is, ‘NEVER UP, NEVER IN.”
“Oh, that will never do!” exclaimed the wife. “That’s what started the argument in the first place!”
Australian Man
Named World's Oldest Competitive Soccer Player At 79
https://www.youtube.com/shorts/fJA1Ki59KsQ
By Ben Hooper
Jan. 26 (UPI) -
- An Australian man who plays for his local soc- cer team became a Guinness World Record holder as the world's old- est competitive player at the age of 79.
Guinness World Records said David Mudge, who celebrated his 80th birthday on Wednesday,
was 79 years and 89 days
old when he played for
the Kissing Point Football Club in a Northern Suburbs Football Association game against North Turramurra.
Mudge, who plays for the over-45 team every week of the season, applied for the Guinness World Record after his
son learned the previous record- holder for oldest competitive foot- ball (soccer) player (male) was only 73 years old.
GWR said its rules required Mudge to remain on the field for an entire 90- minute game, which the player achieved in the April 25, 2022, match.
iAV - Antelope Valley Digital Magazine