Page 17 - IAV Digital Magazine #614

iAV - Antelope Valley Digital Magazine
London Comedy Club Bans Audience Members With ‘Frozen Faces From Botox'
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Tlnw1mYbQIo
By Ben Hooper
March 10 (UPI) -- The owner of a London come- dy club announced he is banning audience mem- bers with Botox injections after performers com- plained about unrespon- sive faces in the crowd.
Mark Rothman, owner of the Top Secret Comedy Club, said the
business' two venues have decided not to allow patrons with Botox injections to be in the audience for comedy shows.
"I've had numerous com- plaints from performers who find it increasingly challenging to gauge audi- ence engagement and
bounce off their reactions," Rothman said in a news release. "Comedy thrives on connection, and facial expressions play a huge part. We want people to laugh, cry, frown, sneer, but frozen faces from Botox impact the entire atmosphere."
Rothman said audience members will be submitted to an expression check at the front door to ensure their faces are able to move before being admit- ted.
"We hope trialing this ban will help move the needle and get facial reactions back into the room -- for the benefit of our comedi- ans and the audience," he said.
An army general is newly stationed in a desert post. On his first day, he calls for a sol- dier to show him around. While doing this, he notices a camel randomly tied to a tent.
He asks the sol- dier, “Soldier, why is that camel tied to the tent?”
The soldier looks awkward and answers, “Er, well Sir, as you know there are no women on the base so er, the camel is there for when the men get certain...um...urg es”
The general nods in understanding And says, “Well I don’t condone this behaviour, but I suppose I understand”
A few weeks into the post, the gen- eral starts feel- ings these urges himself. He calls for the soldier to
bring the camel to his tent. He then goes outside, gets a stool, and has wild animal sex with the camel.
After he’s fin- ished, he climbs confidently off of the stool and sees the soldier staring at him, wide-eyed.
“So” the general says with a grin, “Is that how you boys do it here?”
The soldier answers, still wide-eyed, “No Sir, we usually just ride the camel into the nearby town where the women are”
A family is visiting the zoo; mom, dad, and their young son.
As they’re looking at the elephants the boy asks his mother: “Mommy, what’s that hang- ing off the ele- phant?” She
replies: “That’s his trunk!” The lit- tle boy says: “No, no! On the other end!” She replies: “That’s the ele- phants tail.”
The little boy says: “No! No! Next to his leg!” The mom gets flustered and says: “Oh, it’s nothing!
Go ask your father!” The little boy asks his father the same questions, ending up frustrated and saying: “No! No! No!
What’s that next to his leg?” The father replies: “Well son, that’s the elephant’s penis”
The little boy thinks for minute, and asks his father: “Well, why did mommy say it was nothing?” Father replies: “Well son, your mom is a little spoiled”
iAV - Antelope Valley Digital Magazine