Page 17 - IAV Digital Magazine #545

iAV - Antelope Valley Digital Magazine
A farmer was heading home from the market with his horse and cart.
Suddenly, he saw a snail crossing the road:
The farmer was a kind man, so he stopped his horse and waited patiently as the snail got out of the way.
When the snail was safe in the grass, the farmer was about to con- tinue down the road when sud- denly, a fairy appeared by the roadside.
“Since you’ve always been kind to animals, big and small, I shall grant you three wishes.” The fairy said.
“Well, in that case.” The farmer said. “I want a chest full of gold. AndIwantanew cart for my horse. And...”
The man went silent and thought about it for a moment and then said. “Well, to be honest, I’m not
very well endowed. I want the genitalia my horse has!”
The fairy waved her wand, and everything that the man had wished for came true.
When he got back to the farm, the farmer’s wife was surprised to see him sitting on a brand new cart. She was even more surprised when he showed her a chest full of gold.
But when the farmer stood up and pulled down his pants, she immediately faint- ed.
The farmer bent down to inspect his new equip- ment which was apparently so impressive that it had made his wife faint.
He exclaimed. “Damnit, I forgot I brought the mare today!”
A couple pur- chased a talking parrot on their honeymoon,
much to the groom’s annoy- ance, since the bird did a running commentary on their lovemaking.
The groom finally threw a towel over the cage and threatened to give the parrot to the zoo if it didn’t quit.
The next morning, packing to return home, the newly- weds couldn’t close a large suit- case.
“Honey,” the groom said, “you get on top and I’ll try.”
That didn’t work. Figuring they needed more weight on the lid, she said, “Sweetheart, you get on top and I’ll try.”
Still no success. Then the man said, “Let’s both get on top and try.”
At that point, the parrot yanked away the towel and said,
“Zoo or no zoo, this I’ve got to see!”
'Still Perfectly Crispy': 60-
year-old McDonald's Meal Found In Wall of Illinois House
ILLINOIS, USA — Have you ever wondered what McDonald's French fries would like after 60 years? Well, no need to look any further for the answer!
A family in Illinois found a 60-year-old McDonald's meal in a bathroom wall during a renovation,
the New York Post explains. A man named Rob shared a picture of his discovery that shows three old McDonald's wrappers.
The real kicker? There was even
a half-empty container of fries! "Our house was built in 1959 and pretty sure these have been there since. Still per- fectly crispy," Rob, who used the handle slam- minsammy2109, wrote on Reddit.
So how was the hidden meal uncovered? Rob told Newsweek h e noticed a piece of cloth stuck behind plaster and pulled it out to show his wife.
It was balled up and something was noticeably inside. After unwrapping it, they found the
old McDonald's bag and fries, Newsweek explains.
"[The house] is very close to a McDonald's loca- tion that opened around then so I assume it found its way into our wall from the original builders," Rob explained to the media outlet.
Just down the road from the house, one of the first McDonald's restaurants was opened in 1955. Who knows if the meal was pur- chased from that specific location!
iAV - Antelope Valley Digital Magazine