Page 17 - IAV Digital Magazine #568
P. 17

iAV - Antelope Valley Digital Magazine
A husband and wife are getting cozy in bed.
The passion is heating up.
But then the wife stops and says, “I don’t feel like it. I just want you to hold me.”
The husband asks why.
She explains that he must not be in tune with her emotional needs as a woman.
The husband real- izes that nothing is going to happen tonight and he might as well deal with it.
So the next day the husband takes her shopping at a big dept. store.
They walk around and she tries on three very expen- sive outfits.
He then tells his wife “We’ll take all three of them”.
They then get matching shoes, a set of diamond earrings and a diamond bracelet.
The wife is so excited she thinks her husband has flipped out, but she does not care and goes to the pay desk.
Her husband says, ” No – no – no, honey we’re not going to buy all this stuff.”.
His wife’s face
goes blank.
“No honey – I just want you to hold this stuff for a while. ”
Her face gets really red and she is about to explode and then the husband says “You must not be in tune with my financial needs as a man!
A recently divorced woman is walking along the beach con- templating how badly she came out in the divorce settlement, when she spies a lamp washing up onshore.
She rubs the lamp, and out pops a genie.
The genie notices her anger and lets her vent her trou- bles to him.
Then the genie informs that he will give her three wishes.
But, he cautions her, because he does not believe in divorce, he will give her ex-hus- band ten times what she wishes for.
The woman is steaming mad, thinking that this is hardly fair, but she makes her first wish.
The first wish was for a billion dol- lars.
The genie grants
her wish and she finds herself sit- ting on one billion dollars.
The genie then reminds her that her husband is now the recipient of 10 billion dol- lars.
The woman can barely contain her anger when she makes her second wish.
The second wish was for a beautiful mansion on the shore of her own private beach.
In an instant it was granted, but the genie then reminds again that her ex-husband now owns ten of what she wished for.
Upon hearing this, the woman takes her time to con- template her last wish.
Just as the genie was about to give up on her, the woman informs the genie that she wants to make the last wish.
But, before she can do this, the genie again warns her that her ex- husband will get ten times what she wishes for.
No problem, said the woman as she grinned in ecsta- sy.
For my last wish..”I’d like to give birth to twins.
Trump Says He Feels Like Elvis After Jan. 6 Choir Song Hits No. 1 On The Charts
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hibnneJr3Uc
Story by Julia Mueller
(The Hill) — Former President Donald Trump said he feels "like Elvis" after his song with a group of men convicted for the Jan. 6, 2021, insurrec- tion at the Capitol hit the top of music charts.
"It's Donald Trump and the J Six prisoners," Trump said in a new interview with Fox News host Sean Hannity.
"On iTunes and on Amazon and on Billboard, which is the big
deal, No. 1. Donald Trump,” he said. “So now I feel like Elvis.”
The single "Justice for All" - a rendition of the "The Star- Spangled Banner" sung by prisoners as Trump recites the Pledge of Allegiance - hit number one on Billboard's digital song sales chart.
5 big questions if Trump gets indicted
It also hit the top of the
iTunes sales chart. The pro- ceeds benefit those incarcerat- ed in connection with Jan. 6.
"It was No. 1. And you know what that is? That’s a tribute to the fact that people feel that J Six people have been very unfair- ly treated," Trump said.
The former presi- dent opened his first official 2024 campaign
rally by playing the song
and reportedly s howing footage of the insurrec- tion.
Fox News
host Brian Kilmeade on Monday called it "insane" for Trump to contin- ue focusing on Jan. 6.
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