Page 17 - IAV Digital Magazine #560

iAV - Antelope Valley Digital Magazine
Wife comes home late at night and quietly opens the door to her bed- room.
From under the blanket she notices four legs instead of two!
She reaches for a baseball bat and starts hitting the blanket as hard as she can.
Once she’s done, she goes to the kitchen to have a drink.
As she enters, she sees her hus- band there, read- ing a magazine.
-Hi darling, he says,
-Your parents have come to visit us, so I let them stay in our bed- room.
Hope you said hello to them.
Two young engi- neers applied for a single position at a computer company.
They both had the same qualifica- tions. In order to determine which individual to hire, the applicants were asked to take a test by the manager.
Upon completion of the test, both men missed only one of the ques- tions.
The manager went to the first applicant and said, “Thank you for your interest, but we’ve decided to give the job to the other appli- cant.”
“And why would you be doing that? We both got 9 questions cor- rect,” asked the rejected applicant.
“We have based our decision not on the correct answers, but on the question you missed,” said the Department man- ager.
“And just how would one incor- rect answer be better than the other?” the reject- ed applicant inquired.
“Simple,” said the Department man- ager, “Your fellow applicant put down on question 5, ‘I don’t know.’
You put down, neither do I.
I went to a mixed religion conven- tion.
The Christian Priest came, laid his hands on my hand and said, “By the will of Jesus Christ, you will walk today!”
I smiled and told him I was not paralysed.
The Rabbi came, laid his hands on my hand and said, “By the will of God Almighty, you will walk today!
I was less amused when I told him there was nothing wrong with me.
The Mullah came, took my hands and said, “Insha Allah, you will walk today!” I snapped at him, “There’s nothing wrong with me”
The Buddhist Monk came, held my hands and said, “By the will of The Great Buddha, you will walk today!”
I rudely told him there was nothing wrong with me.
After the ser- mons, I stepped outside and found my car had been stolen.
WSP Trooper Fines Driver $553 For Driving With Windshield Covered In Snow
By KATU Staff
A Washington State Patrol trooper gave a driver a $553 ticket for driving with a windshield almost complete- ly covered in snow.
The trooper pulled over the driver over after getting reports of someone "driving erratically" on
State Route 16. State police found the vehicle driving five miles further down the road, still com- pletely covered in snow.
The driver got a $553 ticket for negligent driving in the 2nd degree, WSP said.
When asked, the driver said their
windshield wipers weren't working.
Not only is it important for visi- bility, troopers say, but for the safety of other drivers on the road.
If ice or other snow debris were to fly off your car and hit another vehicle, you can be liable
iAV - Antelope Valley Digital Magazine