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it is the ability to respond. When you blame others, that’s the end of it. You’re stuck: whether you can see it at the time or not.
“Sorry I’m late. It was the traffic/the weather/my ex!”
No it wasn’t. You didn’t plan properly.
If you blame the traffic or the weather or your ex what’s going to happen next time? You’re helpless to respond.
You rule. Not the traffic or the weather or your ex.
The main idea behind Julian Rotter's social learning theory is that your personality develops through your interaction with your environment. The expectations you bring to a situation not only influence the outcome but they also rule how hard you try, how anxious you are in the situation, and ultimately how things turn out.
Fortunately your locus of control is not fixed. You can change it if you want to.
There Are No Winners In The Blame Game
Blaming others is no big surprise. We are surrounded by helpless language. Just look at today’s headlines! “The politicians are to blame.” “Blame it on the unions.” “The doctor says it’s impossible.” “Life’s too short.” “It’s Monday!”
Listen to your friends and neighbors, “No pain, no gain.” “Obesity is a disease.” “He’s shy.” “It is what it is.” “I’ll believe

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