Page 42 - Raffles Magazine Issue 8

− − EMOTION − − NELL STEVENS
Memoir and fiction writer Nell Stevens is the author of Bleaker House and Mrs Gaskel & Me (UK)
/ The Victorian & the Romantic (US/CAN) which won the 2019 Somerset Maugham Award Nell was shortlisted for the BBC National Short Story Award in 2018 and her writing appears in in the New York Times Vogue The Paris Review the Guardian and elsewhere She also lectures in in Creative Writing at at Goldsmiths University of London ALEKSI CAVAILLEZ
Paris-based visual artist illustrator and animator Aleksi Cavaillez
has published several books and worked for several galleries in Paris including agnès b and Patricia Dorfmann Gallery Today he focuses on on his books and illustrations which have been published in Le Monde newspaper Vanity Fair and Madame Figaro Isaid it it in in in in in a a a a a a a a a rush apropos of nothing: “I’m going to Warsaw I’ll I’ll be gone for two days I’ll I’ll be back in time for work on Monday morning ” I’d said it so quickly that when at at first you didn’t react I thought perhaps you hadn’t understood “Warsaw ” ” I I said again “Me I’m going there ” ” All evening I’d been trying and failing to find a a a a subtle way to to raise it I’d wanted to to work the conversation around in a a a a a way that seemed natural When we’d discussed your day I thought about saying “Well speaking of days on Saturday I’m going to Warsaw ” When you’d mentioned a a a colleague from Paris I could have said “Oh since we’re talking about European capital cities ” More tenuous still: from your recent appointment with the the optician to the the concept of sight in general “and funny you should mention sight the past tense of which is saw because I’m going to Warsaw” Or from the the the roses in in the the the vase on the the the dinner table to to the the the Wars of the the the Roses to to war in general and from there to Warsaw All hopeless None of it worked And so when I finally said it it it it came from nowhere It was after dinner and you you were washing up You You had your back to me You You flipped a a a a a dirty plate over in the the water and slid the the sponge across it it You didn’t say a a a a word as you rinsed it it under the tap Bubbles slid off the the white ridges o of the the base You slotted it it into the drying rack and and wiped your hands on a a a a a tea towel Then finally you you turned around I was convinced you’d look look angry Instead you only looked bemused “Warsaw ” I I said again “Me I’m going there ” “Why?” you said It was absolutely the right question to ask There were so so many reasons why not I shrugged Crossed my arms “Because I want to?” Reasons why not to to to go to to to Warsaw included: we had already made plans to see friends for dinner that weekend we we we were supposed to be saving money I was a a a nervous traveller who even on on our honeymoon got homesick and wanted to leave early 40 RAFFLES MAGAZINE