Page 16 - #LoveWarrior

We receive it.

That's the secret, ladies. I'm here to tell you that all those years we heard, “Give your man this, give him that, give
him more than you receive,” has left us nothing but brokenhearted, feeling used, and underappreciated. It has left us
pouring – and I do mean pouring – into a man just to find out it was the wrong man and the wrong relationship. We
left the relationship feeling taken for granted, defeated, and stripped of our confidence.

Receiving love from a man can also be terrifying, especially after we’ve been hurt a time or two. We learn to distrust
ourselves and the men who would love us. Part of the mission of this book is to teach you the principles of how to
receive love after heartbreak.

In order to be in a relationship with our Savior, Jesus Christ, we must receive His unconditional love and
forgiveness, right? We must receive His sacrifice as payment in full for our debt, right?

We must receive love.

Is it important to be an active participant of a team? Absolutely. Is it important to still give? Yes. But we must make
sure we are giving the right things. We must give our acceptance of his love. Allow me to explain.

Sons have a special bond with their mothers. Whether they have only had a short time with her or they still have
weekly dinners, the love between a mother and her son is unparalleled. She gave him life. She offered the full
package of ultimate love to him – her body. Within her, he had a space to sleep, to grow, and a place where her love
and nutrition poured into him for months. She gave of herself. This is why men – whether they know it or not – have
a deep desire to give. They have a longing to give of themselves as their mother once did (this is why it's so
important to pair yourself with a man who has a healthy, loving relationship with his mother). Now, listen up ladies,
this is where you come in.

Genesis 2:24 tells us: “Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and
they shall be one flesh” (KJV).

Sound familiar? He must leave the home of his mother and father and enter into yours. Follow my thought process
here. She gave him everything, right? Every comfort, every need, every desire – his every whimper and whine was
catered to. And yet…he still must leave to begin a life with you. As boys enter into manhood, their need to give is
switched on. Their time of receiving more than they are giving ends with their mom. Leave it there. Now a man, he
longs to give to you – and to see you receive.

I know this is the complete opposite of what we have all been told. The truth is that giving of ourselves sacrificially
means receiving unconditional love first. Think back to your last airplane flight. Before taking off, the lovely flight
attendants remind us to secure our oxygen masks first before assisting someone else. This is because, in order to give
life, we must receive life. Our relationships with our men are the same. We need to accept first. Take Christmas, for
example: haven't you ever heard someone talk about how the greatest part of opening gifts was seeing your face
when you tore off the wrapping paper? Men crave our smiles. It breathes life into their lungs and hope into their
hearts. Without the satisfaction of seeing us receive the gifts, their love tanks become empty, and their strength to
carry on dwindles. You want to give the ultimate, priceless gift to your man? Receive his love. The act of him giving
isn't successful until you've received.

Ladies, this is a choice. We decide to either reject or accept love. He gives love in the sweet gestures along the way:
your favorite flowers on a Tuesday after work, just because; a sweet note he leaves somewhere you'll find later; a
romantic dinner he prepares for you as he starts a fire for you to relax by. He gives love in the small moments along
the way: a gentle kiss on the forehead, a surprise evening of dancing in your living room with a playlist he carefully
created; planning a fun activity to do together, an adventure to go on together. He gives love with his honorable
actions, when he acts in character as your protector, provider, priest, and prophet (Voddie Baucham, What He Must
Be…If He Wants to Marry My Daughter). Let me issue a warning here: Ladies, if you are not actively looking for
these gestures, you will be blind to them. Additionally, if you do not show your appreciation in the moment, you risk

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