Page 120 - Wedding Essentials & Essential Groom Issue 7

EBYE-BYE BACHELORHOOD!
veryone sees a wedding as a huge cele- bration or party, which it most definitely is, but there’s not much focus on the huge transition that it really is. This rite of pas-
sage is a momentous life changing experience and there are major changes that you undergo in terms of your identity and your lifestyle – it’s exactly like growing up and going from being a child to a teenager (and we all remember what that was like).
It’s essential that couples are equipped with the nec- essary tools to deal with their fears and apprehensions of leaving their old lives behind. Acknowledge the past by talking about it and only through discussion can you leave it behind and embrace your new life. Starting your own family is a huge step as you no longer exist as a sin- gle person but as two people living as one; bound to each other legally, spiritually, physically, emotionally and on so many other levels.
Even if you’ve been living together, a wedding solidi- fies your commitment to each other and there’s a sense of definiteness that needs to be accepted and embraced. There’s no more dating, flirting or sleeping around. There’s no more freedom to come and go as you please; you’ll have to report on your movements. It’s common that this makes you feel restrained but you must be willing to firstly acknowledge these feelings and then
to discuss them with each other. You’ll very quickly be reminded of all the positives and rewards that being in a partnership brings. Knowing you’re with the person of your dreams; someone who loves and cares for you, makes it all worthwhile.
Responsibility and accountability are also huge factors that need to be embraced. Now everything you do is not just all about and for you, it’s for both of you. You can no longer be financially frivolous neither can you go out drinking all night. You must realize that there is now someone else who is affected by your actions. For men this transition is more difficult as culturally men are conditioned to look out for themselves, whilst women tend to embrace the idea of marriage and sharing their lives with someone more naturally. It’s of course vital that you still maintain your own identities and lead
your own lives. Sustaining hobbies and nurturing your friendships are essential but discuss how much time will be set aside to pursue these and ensure you spend enough time together.
Wedding Essentials | 120