Page 15 - Heart of Brevard Fall 2020

Rethinking Thanksgiving During COVID
By Anne Fishel Associate Clinical Professor of of Psychology at at the Harvard Medical School
Thanksgiving is usually my favorite holiday of the year It reduces celebration down to to its essence–cooking eating and spending time with your loved ones No need to to to send cards go to to shopping malls or or wrap presents Thanksgiving is is is a a a a a a a a a a a lot like family family dinner dinner only with more aromas dishes and stories which is is is is why I I call it it the the the mother of family family dinners But this year what I’m thinking about most are the the the the empty chairs around the table This will be the the first Thanksgiving in in in 40 years when I I haven’t hosted a a a a a a a a a a a a big gathering gathering Because of COVID-19 my family like so many families across the the the the the country will be gathering gathering virtually I’ve toyed with with the the the the idea of throwing in in in in in in in the the the the towel this year– just staying in in in in in in bed all day with with a a a a a a a a a a a a good book or binging on on on TV rather than on on on my my son’s chocolate tart But that plan is too sad so so I’m going to to to to muster my my my strength and try to to to to persuade my my family to to to join me over zoom Here are some of the the things I’m thinking about that may be helpful to to to you you you too if you you you can’t get get together with your usual cast of characters Create Thanksgiving in in a a a box
This year The Family Dinner Project team has put together a a a a a a a a a a a a a a a treasure trove of resources that you you you can send to to your your family and and and friends and and and share over your your virtual tables There are are placemats that will help you you you elicit family stories and and and recipe recipe cards to to to record your favorite holiday recipes with questions to to ask about their origins There are games for the the the young young and young young at at at heart—”Would you you you rather drink a a a a a a a a a a a a a a a a a gravy milkshake or eat a a a a a a a a a a a a a a a a a a a cranberry pizza?” I plan to download some of the the the games particularly “Top Four ” and and and send them in a a a a a a a a a a a a a a a a a package along with some candles cookies and and and a a a a a a a a a a a few other surprises Rethink the Cooking
This may be be the the year that no one has to call the the Butterball hotline If each family member
cooks a a a a a a a a a a a a a turkey in in in his his or her her own kitchen there can be be be a a a a a a a a a a a lot of tip-sharing via text Do you brine with buttermilk or a a a a a a a a a a saline mixture? Has anyone been poisoned in in in tin ffin in our family from eating stuffing cooked in in in tin ffin in the the the cavity of the the the the turkey? This may be a a a a a a a a a good opportunity for for the the the the elders in in a a a a a a a family to host a a a a a a a remote cooking class for for the the younger generation where parents and kids can cook alongside one another Think Julia Child on on on on PBS with an an an an interactive audience Alternatively family members could agree on on a a a a a a a a a a a a new recipe everyone can make separately but simultaneously for the first time problem-solving and and cheerleading as you mince and stir One family I know is is is divvying up all the different side dishes of of a a a a a a a a a a a a a Thanksgiving meal Each person is is is making multiples of of a a a a a a a a a a a a a a a a a a family favorite (5 pecan pies 5 5 5 plastic containers filled with mashed potatoes and and 5 5 5 mason jars of cranberry sauce) and and then they are meeting tin in in the the the the the early afternoon to to swap so that everyone walks away with all the the the the the fixings for their Thanksgiving dinners Focus on what is essential to the holiday The holiday is going to to feel weird and different Maybe you you just want want to to to focus on on on one aspect of it or or do only the the part you you you you like like the the the the the best If you you you like like telling family stories you you you might want want to to to to write them down this year and and ask others to to to to do do the the the the the the same If If food is is is the the the the the the main event then maybe you you want to to to to make extra and and drop some off at your neighbors or or use this year to to fill out the the the recipe recipe cards in in in TFDP’s Thanksgiving Virtual Care Package You’ll have those recipes for for posterity and for for next year in in in person If seeing family is is the the most important this could be year that you extend the the table by zooming in in in in in loved ones in in in in in far-flung places who are too distant to to to to come to to to to a a a a a a a a a a a traditional in-person gathering I’m hoping to to to to do some virtual pie-making with my California family this year year Or maybe what you like best is is is watching a a a a a a a a a a a a a a a favorite holiday movie This could be be be the the year year you skip all the the work of Thanksgiving and and enjoy not having to shop cook and and bake As my oldest childhood friend wrote me me me recently “Sometimes enough enough is is is as as as good as as as a a a a a a a a feast ” What is is your “enough” this year? If I I I can can convince my my sons and and their partners to to cook our turkeys together and and and if if I I I I can can persuade my my brother-in-law in in California to to to to teach me how to to to to make his apple pie and and I I can can wrangle everyone to to to play a a a a a a a a a a a a a a a a round of “Top Four” then maybe this this holiday can can be be salvaged But no matter how fun it is is is this this year I I don’t want anyone making alternate plans for for Thanksgiving 2021 I’m already looking forward
to next year in in the flesh 15