Page 100 - DFCS NEWS MAGAZINE 2020-1

Taps
Final Flight
_____________________________________________________________________________ JONATHAN A. HAYES, 77
JUNE 11, 1942 – February 5, 2020
On February 5, 2020, Death finally got up the courage to escort Jonathan Armstrong Hayes on the Last Great Adventure. Jonathan was quite curious about what would happen on that journey; he could not promise to send back reports, however.
Living to the ripe, but disgruntled old age of 77, Jonathan had seen numerous changes, many of which he opposed. He disapproved of both the 20th and 21st centuries, feeling that the standards of civilization had slipped most lamentably since the bright golden days of the Edwardian era to which he felt more intellectually and emotionally attuned. Sartorially, he preferred bow ties to long ties and was adamant in his opinion that every well-attired gentleman should wear spats, as he did himself.
A true Renaissance man, he was at various times a highly decorated fighter pilot, author, award-winning amateur wine maker, professional cook, knowledgeable amateur of medieval history, and opera supernumerary. He had climbed Mt. Fuji, run a marathon, ridden the Trans- Siberian railroad (the Russian Rossiya, not the luxury train) and the Venice- Simplon Orient Express, toured Lockheed Corporation’s “Skunk Works”, observed the transit of Venus and seen a live platypus.
A keen opera buff, he was for many years a season box holder in San Francisco and Seattle Operas and saw and heard all the great voices of his
generation. The great operatic mezzo-soprano Marilyn Horne once threw him out of her dressing room, and he had been arrested in Belarus for a visa violation.
He did not own a Smartphone, nor did he ever use social media. He had never watched a Super Bowl.
His many manly virtues were balanced by distressingly few redeeming vices. His original and incisive turn of mind was sometimes mistaken for eccentricity by those of more plodding, pedestrian mentalities. He was a lousy athlete, couldn’t sing and disliked big government, small children and licorice. Although he had owned a Porsche 911, his favorite car was the Honda SM 800 sports car he drove while stationed in Japan. He once shook hands with President Kennedy.
A prolific writer of letters to the editor, mostly on political matters, he could generally count on getting somebody’s hackles up. This obituary is his magnum opus ultimum. While observers of a merely conventional outlook might have categorized Jonathan’s political views as ranging from moderately conservative to totally reactionary, in reality he distrusted all ideologies and regarded himself as a pragmatist, seeing “muddling through” as being almost always the best course of action. He did not care what others thought of him and easily worked with political liberals to promote those civic projects which he considered worthwhile.
Jonathan was born to the Reverend Truman Hayes and Margaret (Swartwout) Hayes in Hyannis, Massachusetts on June 11, 1942. A family legend held he had been born on the hospital lawn; he was bemused to find on close examination of the information in his birth certificate that there was a lot of truth in that family tradition. He had a very happy childhood growing up in rural New England, and was educated at Phillips Academy, Andover, class of 1960, and Tufts University, class of 1964. Summers were spent working as a cook in different summer camps and at the Star Island Conference Center off the shores of New Hampshire.
He had been commissioned as a Second Lieutenant in the Air Force through the Air Force ROTC unit at Tufts and reported to Moody AFB, Georgia for pilot training in January of 1965, thereby commencing the most exhilarating years of his life, which he chronicled in his book, “No Lilies or Violets”.
100 / DFCS News Magazine / SUMMER 2020