Page 982 - Total War on PTSD

my name in print — rather, the faces of so many service members I met and documented over the years.
My military career didn’t end as I’d planned. Injuries from an improvised explosive device sustained in combat precluded me from deploying any further. Therefore, I was faced with a conundrum — either take an administrative role, or retire. I couldn’t see myself riding a desk, so I chose the latter. It was a devastating blow to my moral, not to mention caused a major identity crisis. I’d forgotten how to be anything but Staff Sergeant Stacy Pearsall. Not only did I have to begin the physical healing process, but also address the emotional trauma that had taken place simultaneously. In the subsequent years after my medical retirement, I realized the emotional rehabilitation presented the biggest challenge.
Everything I’d learned in the military was all about defense. For example, if you’re in pain, suck it up; if you’re feeling sad, swallow the sorrow; if you’re scared, hide it. I never faked being sick or in pain. Contrarily, I faked being well. I was a master deceiver. So much so, I lied to myself daily.
For 18 months, I underwent physical rehabilitation and neurological treatments for my cervical spine trauma and Traumatic Brain Injury (TBI). At the same time, I began to look introspectively to address the darker problem looming – Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD).
I tried all types of counseling and treatments for my PTSD – none very successful. I’d acquired some helpful tools from each, but none were a permanent solution. At length, I threw in the towel and just carried on as if nothing was wrong. In fact, I founded the Veterans Portrait Project and traversed the United States taking portraits of fellow Veterans and archiving their stories. I
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