Page 47 - SPRING 2024 EA PAC COURSE FOR PARENTS WEEK 3 SLIDES
P. 47

Follow-up needs the patience and care of a surgeon!




                                             What this looks                                                              What this looks
                 Skill                                                                        Skill
                                                         like                                                                        like

                                  1       I introduce issues in a                                              3       I share my concerns in
                                                                                                                       a way that helps them
                                          way that helps them to
                                          stay calm and feel                                                           to feel supported:

                                          supported:                                                                   I say what I have noticed –

                                                                                                                       starting with the evidence of
                                          When I raise issues, I use phrases                                           what I see and hear.
                                          such as:
                                                                                                                       I use ‘I’ not ‘you’ to stay as
                                          ‘Don’t worry, you’re not in trouble’                                         Positive Challenger, not blamer.


                                          ‘Don’t worry, I want you to feel                                             I use connection phrases
                                          good too.’                                                                   regularly to help.

                                          I listen to understand,                                                      I invite them to
                                  2       not to respond:                                                      4       problem-solve in a way

                                                                                                                       they feel capable:
                                          I listen in a way which aims to
                                          really find out what life is like for                                        I use phrases such as ‘I wonder
                                          the young person.                                                            if you can work out a way in
                                                                                                                       which you feel good and I/others
                                          I stay curious, asking questions to                                          do too?
                                          find out more.
                                                                                                                       When they respond with ‘Don’t
                                          I don’t lecture, criticise or            Good for me, good for you, good for everyone!  know’, I have other phrases
                                          persuade the person to think                                                 which are calm and positive yet
                                          differently.                                                                 also keep pursuing in a way that

                                                                                                                       is kind yet definite.
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