Page 17 - IAV Digital Magazine #504

iAV - Antelope Valley Digital Magazine
Minnesota Woman Dubbed World's Fastest Backward Speller
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4yhzu9lB0G8
By Ben Hooper
Aug. 13 (UPI) -
- A Minnesota woman's unusual talent made her a Guinness World Record holder when she spelled 56 words backward in 1 minute.
Pal Onnen of Hastings said she wanted
to attempt the record to put her town on the map.
Guinness shared video of Onnen quickly spelling 56 backward words from a randomized list
in the 1-minute time limit.
The video also featured Onnen showing off another of her talents: pro- nouncing words backward.
An acquaintance told me:
"Last Sunday I found a wallet packed with money down by the church."
"Did you give it back?" I asked.
"Not yet. I'm still trying to decide if it's a temptation from the devil or the answer to a prayer."
As she passed the young novices, Mother Superior said, "Good morning, ladies," and the novices replied, "Good morning, Mother Superior. May God be with you."
But once they were past, she heard one novice say to another, "She got up on the wrong side of the bed this morn- ing."
Mother Superior was surprised, but decided not to pursue it.
Soon she passed two sisters who had taught there for years. They exchanged pleas- antries, but again she heard them whisper, "She got up on the wrong
side of the bed this morning."
She wondered if she had been harsh with them and vowed to be more pleasant.
Down the hall came retired Sister Mary. They exchanged greet- ings but Sister Mary added right to her face, "Looks like you got up on the wrong side of the bed this morning."
Mother Superior was floored. "Sister Mary, what have I done wrong? Three times this morn- ing someone has said that about me."
Sister Mary looked Mother Superior in the eye. "Oh dear, don't take it per- sonally. It's just that you're wearing Father Murphy's slip- pers!"
Daddy, how was I born ?
The father answers, ‘Well, son, I guess one day you will need to find out any- way!
Your Mom and I first got together
in a chat room on Yahoo.
ThenIsetupa date via e-mail with your Mom andwemetata cyber-cafe.
We sneaked into a secluded room and googled each other.
There your moth- er agreed to a download from my hard drive.
As soon as I was ready to upload, we discovered that neither one of us had used a firewall, and since it was too late to hit the delete but- ton, nine months later a little Pop- Up appeared that said:
‘You got Mail!’
A rather awkward freshman student finally got up the nerve to ask a pretty junior for a dance at the homecoming.
She gave him the once-over and said, "Sorry, I won't dance with a child."
"Oh I'm sorry," responded the underclassman, "I didn't realize you were pregnant."
iAV - Antelope Valley Digital Magazine