Page 17 - IAV Digital Magazine #378

The only true FREE CLASSIFIEDS in the Antelope Valley... Where buyers and sellers meet!
2+acres - 70th west & Ave. D4 $64,000; 2.5acres - 70th west & Ave D8 $47,250; 9+acres - Corner of Phillips & Neuralia Rd $49,500 • 942-8894bs
Mojave: 17acres, agriculture on Hwy 58, flat, surveyed (4Lots). Power in front $100,000 • 824-3333
3acres on Hwy 58. R1, flat w/ electric $48,000 • 824-
3333 257
For sale: N. Edwards: 2.5 acres commercial land w/ 60’ Mobile Home, 2wells, 3,000sqft commercial bldg $299K • 824-3333
Over 200 houses & con- dos in the antelope Valley. bargain Prices. These are bank owned, short pay, foreclosures. call us today. ask for Tamara Stoebe 466-6849 or betty at 661- 944-7171
MOBILE HOME
For Rent: Mobile or Trailer. $350/mo. 8262 E. Ave U, Littlerock • 733-6595379
For Sale: 1988 newly remodeled mobile home, double wide, 3+2, hardwood floors, marble kitchen, ceramic tiles. Space rent $450/mo. $35,000 • 789- 8729378
For sale: 2+1, $7000 • 944- 4729378
For Sale: Commercial zoned. 2.5acres w/ mobile home & 3000sqft metal bldg in No. Edwards $100,000 • 824-3333336
S T O R A g E /
S P A C E
Parking space for rent or for gardening to plant vegeta- bles or???. 5acres on Littlerock on 82nd Ave &
Fri-Sat: 11am-8pm Sun: 11am-6pm Tues: Close 267-6700
anTELOPE VaLLEy SWaP mEET aT FOuR POInTS antelope Valleys’ #1 Open air market. Serving AV for 25 years Hours: Saturdays 7am- 4pm;
Sundays 6am - 4pm 5505 Pearblossom Hwy •
Palmdale
(661)273-0456
VEHiClES
ACCESSORIES
73 Cadillac Eldorado radio, xlnt cond. 8 track am/fm, $60 • 943-6071381
2 Brand new car light in box
for Chevy sprint • 271-7264 Old tire on wheel $10 • 943-
3422 380
20” Chrome rims & tires, 5 universal lugs $350 • 323- 381-5302379
Ave U • 733-6595
376
A little girl was talking to her teacher about whales.
The teacher said it was physically impossible for a whale to swallow a human because even though it was a very large mammal its throat was very small.
The little girl stated that Jonah was swallowed by a whale.
Irritated, the teacher reit- erated that a whale could not swallow a human; it was physically impossi- ble.
The little girl: said, “When I get to heaven I will ask Jonah”.
The teacher: asked, ” What if Jonah went to hell?”
The little girl: replied, “Then you ask him”.
An older, white haired man walked into a jewel- ry store one Friday evening with a beautiful young gal at his side. He told the jeweler he was looking for a special ring for his girlfriend.
The jeweler looked through his stock and brought out a $5,000 ring and showed it to him. The old man said, “I don’t think you under- stand, I want something very special.”
At that statement, the jeweler went to his spe- cial stock and brought another ring over.
“Here’s a stunning ring at only $40,000,” the jewel- er said. The young lady’s eyes sparkled and her whole body trembled with excitement. The old man seeing this said, “We’ll take it.”
The jeweler asked how payment would be made and the old man stated, by check. ” I know you need to make sure my check is good, so I’ll write it now and you can call the bank Monday to verify the funds and I’ll
pick the ring up Monday afternoon,” he said.
Monday morning, a very teed-off jeweler phoned the old man. “There’s no money in that account.”
“I know”, said the old man, “but can you imag- ine the weekend I had?”
The kids filed back into class Monday morning.
They were very excited. Their weekend assign- ment was to sell some- thing, then share with the class how they were suc- cessful.
Little Mary led off, “I sold girl scout cookies and I made $30,” she said proudly, “my sales approach was to appeal to the customer’s civil spirit and I credit that approach for my suc- cess.”
“Very good,” said the teacher.
Little Sally was next, “I sold magazines,” she said, “I made $45 and I explained to everyone that magazines would keep them abreast of current events.”
“Very good, Sally,” said the teacher.
Eventually, it was Little Johnny’s turn. The teacher held her breath. Little Johnny walked to the front of the class- room and dumped a box full of cash on the teacher’s desk. “$2,467? he said.
“$2,467!” cried the teacher, “What in the world were you selling?” “Toothbrushes,” said Little Johnny.
“Toothbrushes?” echoed the teacher, “How could you possibly sell enough toothbrushes to make that much money?”
“I found the busiest cor- ner in town,” said Little Johnny, “I set up a chocolate chip cookie stand and gave every- body who walked by a
free sample.
They all said, “This tastes like MUD!” Then I replied, “It is. Wanna buy a toothbrush?”
A grandmother was pushing her grandchild around Wal-Mart in a buggy. Each time she put something in the basket, she would say, "And here is something for you, Diploma," or "This will make a cute little outfit for you, Diploma," and so on.
Eventually a bewildered shopper who had heard all this finally asked, "Why do you keep calling your grandchild Diploma?"
The grandmother replied, "I sent my daughter to college and this baby is what she came home with!"
Employer to applicant: "In this job we need someone who is respon- sible."
Applicant: "I'm the one you want. On my last job, every time anything went wrong, they said I was responsible."
A man entered a library and asked, "Can I have a pint of lager and a pack- et of crisp?!"
The librarian said "I'm sorry, but this is a library."
Then the man WHIS- PERED "Oh, sorry can I have a pint of lager and a packet of crisp?"
Did you hear that Netscape is moving to Tel-Aviv, Israel?
They're going to rename themself "Netan-Yahoo"
Two fleas were walking out of the cinema when they discovered it was raining hard.
"Shall we walk?" said one flea.
"No," said the other, " lets take a dog."
SEcuRE mInI STORagE. $1 moves you in. Selected sizes. Call for details 24hrs Security, Private PO Boxes, No Deposit Required. Units 10’-12’ high not 8’ 661-947-5400 37560 Sierra Hwy Palmdale
VACATIOn PROPERTy
Polo Towers timeshare in Las Vegas. Across from City Center & Bellagio. Very lux- urious accomodation. 1br/1ba. Deeded, annual usage. Thanksgiving week but floating & days can be divided if you want to go some other time. Strong exchange power. Fraction of developer’s price. Must sell! reduced to $3995, very motivated seller • 944-7171
SPORTinG
GOOdS
MX boots. O’Neal M10, size 10, new in box. Pd $150; sell $75 • 722-5978378
Power X men’s bike. 26’ tires, 18spd. Maroon & grey, almost new $80 • 818-299- 1416378
Speed bag mount. All metal frame, new paint $38 • 272-
9273 bet 8am-8:30pm 376
Used helmet for hockey or football w/ full face guard $15 • 272-9273 bet 8:30am- 8:30pm only373
SWAP mEET
LancaSTER mInI-maLL
44236 10th Street West Lancaster, CA 93534 (Bet Ave J & Ave J4) Mon-Wed-Thurs 10am-7pm
Fri-Sat: 10am-8pm Sun: 10am-6pm Tues: Closed 661-337-9279
PaLmDaLE InTERnaTIOnaL SHOPPIng maLL 2520 E. Palmdale Bl Near Von’s & Burger King Hours: Mon, Wed, Thurs: 11am-8pm
381
Engine 5.7L & tranny for 98 Dodge Dakota 2500. $500
mObILE HOmE FOR SaLE! Double wide. 24x65, Aluminum sidings, 2+2, den. New ref range dishwasher, 2 cooler w/ Aircon in the kitchen. Includes all furni- tures, Fixtures, TV, appliances & others MUST SEE! 661-256-0868 serious inquiry !!!
for all • 874-9658
379
Camper shell for 98 Dodge Dakota, good cond $125 • 575-7994379
Set of 4 tires on 16” Lexus aluminum rims, xlnt cond $200 • 264-3928378
Parting out: 87 Toyota Odessey RV. Heavy duty auto tranny, 19k orig miles, you remove $300 • 309- 2818378
Drawtite tow hitch. Off of 1989 Ford F250, good cond $100 • 818-299-1416378
New super ride all season tire. 1” white wall P185/80R/13 $35 • 818-
299-1416
378
Summit High tire. 195/60R/15 on rim for Honda $70 • 818-299-1416378
New Goodyear tire. 1” white wall on rim P235/75R/15 $70 • 818-299-1416378
Camper shell for 8’ truck
bed • 948-5190
378
New camper shell, used twice $75 • 208-5555378
2 tires: 205/60R/15 $25/each • 400-6914378
Set of 4 truck tires & wheels. Fits any 5 lugs.
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661-266-4-ADS
ANTELOPE VALLEY FREE CLASSIFIEDS ;