Page 67 - Tree of Happiness

Finally, she must face the Dragon. In our real world, "Dragons" are the tasks, responsibilities and people we avoid. This is very typical human behavior but it is also very ineffective human behavior.
By avoiding them, we give them "power" as we give them "power" they become scarier and other simlar tasks, responsibilities, people also assume the ability to become our personal "dragons".
But as in the fable, when the Queen faced the Dragon, it turned and ran away. Most situations we fear get scarier the more we avoid them. Once faced, they usually turn out to be very manageable and then, we can’t imagine why we were so afraid of them.
An understanding that Dragons (personal fears) are to be faced and rarely avoided is a very difficult and demanding lesson. The skill to use coping self- messages and to face these fears takes practice.
When your child says, "I don't want to..." they may really be saying "I am afraid to...". Help them get in touch with what they are thinking..." When you think about...(trying out for the play, talking to ....," and so on. "What are you also telling yourself about ...".
They may say that they may look foolish or will be embarrassed and made fun of. All of this is good information that you and your child can discuss as examples of their "dragons". Remind them of what the Queen told herself about facing the Dragon and how even though she was afraid, she knew she would have to face it.
It is a truth, the more you avoid facing your dragons, the stronger they become but once you face them, you realize that you can deal not only with this dragon but others that may arise.
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