Page 30 - FS-Jeff the Monkey

Worksheet
None of us live in a vacuum and learning how not to play into the “Jeffs” of the world takes work. The younger monkeys could have told themselves, “it is too bad that Jeff has no food but I am not going to let him bully me. He is just as able as I am to get food.” Since most of us, particularly young children have had little practice at being assertive; they need to understand that they may experience some negative emotions themselves. They may feel a little angry, scared or guilty but that does not mean that being honest and assertive is wrong.
Most children do not have a very sophisticated repertory of coping cognitions and responses. You are trying to prompt assertiveness such as, “tell him that he needs to get his own fruit” or “if you don’t stop it, I will tell an adult.” Do not encourage aggressive or passive behavioral reactions, “I’ll hit him on the head” or “Tell him that if he stops whining everything will be fine .”
When working with a novel approach to deal with a situation, there probably will not be a perfect answer or even unanimity of opinion. When considering the impact of their assertiveness, some children may say that it would help while others will disagree that it would be helpful.
1. What Good Thinking could the other monkeys have told themselves when Jeff bullied them?
(Jeff has to learn how to get his own bananas. I don’t have to give him mine)
2. When the other monkeys thought that way, how would they feel?
(Maybe a little scared that Jeff might get angry...but okay about their decision)
3. What could they have told Jeff about his bullying behavior?
(They could have told him that giving him bananas was not helping him grow up)
4. Would that have been helpful to him?
(Yes , because he would have learned how to climb and be able to leave with
the others)
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