Page 108 - Microsoft Word - SPIRIT AND THE MIND.doc

92 SPIRIT AND THE MIND
when all of sudden it turned and dove out of control. Helpless and panic-stricken, she was unable to stabilize it. As she had been dealing with spiritual themes in the treatment, at one level the dream suggested her mortal fear of non-being of ego, if her consciousness soared to a height beyond mind.
As I listened, I had the impulse to relate a Sai Baba miracle that had occurred recently, thinking that it might serve to deepen her appreciation of, and faith in, higher dimensions of consciousness and even, perhaps, calm her fear of exploring these dimensions. But after I had related the story, to my surprise she reacted not with calm and confidence, or even intellectual curiosity—but with stark panic. I didn’t expect to see this fear in such vivid relief. Quickly preparing my recorder, I captured her initial startling reaction. Below is a brief section of this reaction and, following it, a transcript of the session one week later, when she was able to discuss the incident under better control and with more insight. The transcript is slightly edited for clarity.
One thing more: the specific miracle I related is, I feel, not important. I had told her of many others before without this kind of response. And when she mentioned it to her husband, he had no different response than when hearing of other Sai Baba miracles. Both she and her husband recognized that the difference lay with her. For some reason, A.T. was ready to hear in a new way, apparently having gone through some subtle change in consciousness that prepared her for this reaction.
THE REACTION
Seeing A.T. speechless and frightened, I asked:
S: What are you afraid of?
A: I don’t know what I’m afraid of! I feel jumbled. It’s like my
mind’s gone on tilt. Nothing computes.
S: Was your mind jarred?
A: Yes.
S: Can you describe what happened to your thinking?
A: I felt suspended—I was just sitting there. I wasn’t moving. My
mouth wasn’t open. I wasn’t blinking—it was like I had been arrested at some point. And I couldn’t move forward or backward—or anything. It was like everything stopped. Have you read the books by Carlos Castenada, the Don Juan books where he talks about