Page 204 - She's One Crazy Lady!

August 12th 2002
Medical with Occupational Health: “My life changed today.”
I was to meet with a Doctor at a Medical Centre in Wellingborough – not my Medical Centre. I call him ‘Dr W’. Dr W explained that the LEA had asked him to conduct the medical. I did wonder if it was going to be a physical examination but it wasn’t. He went on to say he had received a letter from a Senior Education Officer which outlined the situation the school was in, saying it would test the skills of a very experienced Headteacher. I was asked about my breast cancer journey and how I
would have felt if the bone scan had shown the cancer had returned. “Did they prepare you for bad news?”
“What would you have done if it was bad news?” Why such questions? I replied:
“I hope I would deal with it the way I did when Mr Stewart gave me the initial diagnosis.”
Still he went on... about life expectancy being shortened if the cancer did come back...
I told him I was aware of that but it wasn’t something I wanted to think about at present, and hopefully, never!
I tried to explain to Dr W how I felt about all the recent attempts by the LEA in pushing me to take ill-health retirement and that I wanted to go back to school because I loved it – it was all that I had worked for.
“You know, whatever, things will not be the same as they were and could never be. This is your first Headship. The finger will be pointed at you if anything goes wrong and, initially, you are going to be exhausted. As Headteacher, a phased return, working with another Head, is not going to work.”
It was all sounding so negative but I could sense he was genuinely concerned about my health. He looked me in the eye.
“It’s not going to work. I have to put you and your health first. You are more important. You have only just finished treatment; it’s early days and I feel you need more time to build your strength up.”
He told me to take myself off, to go for a little walk, to think about what he said and go straight back to see him.
I felt in shock and wished I’d had someone there with me. I can’t remember my walk as I felt so drained and bewildered. But – something in my head made me think that perhaps he was right and found myself telling him so when I went back in to see him again – not my intention at all, but I was tired of all this.
What I had agreed to I didn’t know.
Dr W said his recommendation was that I was fit to work as a Headteacher, but not at Highfields at this time, and would advise the Authority to find me temporary employment (as a Headteacher) until such time that I was deemed fit to cope with the demands of the school – possibly at the beginning of the Spring Term. As from this day I would officially be on “medical suspension” – whatever that meant.
“You know, whatever, things will not be the same as they were and could never be. This is your first Headship. The finger will be pointed
at you if anything goes wrong and, initially, you are going to be exhausted. ”
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Confused as I was, I hung on to his words: “Fit to work as a