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Senior Voice of Citrus County - JUNE 2020 • 23
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George Carlin Humor SENIOR VOICE
Geor
ge Carlin Humor
• One good reason to only maintain a small circle of friends is that three out
of four murders are committed by people who know the victim. To advertise or get
• Whenever you see the word “cuisine” used instead of the word “food,” be
prepared to pay an additional eighty percent. information: call
• Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker? 352-277-6309
• Why are hemorrhoids called “hemorrhoids” instead of “assteroids”?
• Have you ever noticed that the lawyer always smiles more than the client?
Fun & Games
• Have you ever noticed that anybody driving slower than you is an idiot, Answers
and anyone going faster than you is a maniac? From page 20
MUMBO JUMBO Presidents
TOAD RELIGION this virus? First, we can be Final Message: Carter Ford
continued from page 21 understanding of the fact that some Reagan
continued from page 19 Clinton
will eat almost anything it can people are scared and worried. Bush
Second, we can listen to people
put in its mouth and an easy meal lift you up? Who’s the voice of talk about their fears without BAMBOOZABLE
encouragement in your life? In
will keep them from moving on to whose life are you the voice of interrupting them. Third, we can 6. Three little pigs 5. Four square
other sources of food. Capturing encouragement? offer a word of hope no matter 4. Merry go round 3. Looking high and low
them by hand and humanely how bad things might look. The 2. For rent
euthanizing them is the best Complaining solves nothing. Bible tells us in 1 Thessalonians 1. A tune up
method for control but requires Criticism rarely motivates. Instead 5:11, “Therefore encourage one PHRASE SCRAMBLE
of being the voice of negativity,
some evening captures when adult be the voice of encouragement. another and build each other up, Mark Twain
toads are the most active. Instead of telling people what just as in fact you are doing.” with my education. schooling interfere
Once you capture them, rub some they can’t do, tell people what The secret to making a difference I have never let my
is to decide that you are going to
20% benzocaine or lidocaine on they can do. Instead of pointing be the voice of encouragement for HINK PINKS
out people’s mistakes, point out
their belly and drop them in the their successes. Instead of griping the people you know. You will be 10. Hound Sound 9. Pup Cup
freezer for a long 24-hour nap about people, lift people to a the person who offers hope and 8. Brave Slave
before disposing of them in the higher level. encourages people to keep going 7. Sneak Peek 6. Lid Grid
trash. Simply putting them in until the difficulties go away and 5. Tea Fee 4. Horse Course
the fridge for two hours, prior to When a negative person enters the path becomes clear. Encourage 3. Town Clown
the room, people look for ways to
the freezer nap, will humanely hide and leave the room. Nobody your spouse. Encourage 2. Youth Truth 1. Buck Truck
euthanize them as well. Identify wants to hear the griping and your family. Encourage your SUDOKU
the toad prior to its capture. complaining of a negative person. neighbors. Encourage your
friends. Francois Arago needed
Never capture or euthanize toads But when an encourager enters the a voice of encouragement from
less than 1 ½” in length to avoid room, people line up to talk with Jean d’Alembert to accomplish
destroying native species. him or her. Everybody wants to his goals. Someone in your
talk with the encourager because life needs you to be the voice
For more information, visit: everybody needs encouragement. of encouragement for them.
https://edis.ifas.ufl.edu/uw432, You become that voice of
or https://www.youtube.com/ How can we encourage each other encouragement when you seek to
as we struggle together through
watch?v=Cg1HUuxM7Zc bring out the best in people.