Page 901 - bleak-house

in it. She did both, I fear; certainly he never saw her, never
heard of her from that hour. Nor did any one.’
‘Oh, guardian, what have I done!’ I cried, giving way to
my grief; ‘what sorrow have I innocently caused!’
‘You caused, Esther?’
‘Yes, guardian. Innocently, but most surely. That seclud-
ed sister is my first remembrance.’
‘No, no!’ he cried, starting.
‘Yes, guardian, yes! And HER sister is my mother!’
I would have told him all my mother’s letter, but he
would not hear it then. He spoke so tenderly and wisely to
me, and he put so plainly before me all I had myself imper-
fectly thought and hoped in my better state of mind, that,
penetrated as I had been with fervent gratitude towards him
through so many years, I believed I had never loved him so
dearly, never thanked him in my heart so fully, as I did that
night. And when he had taken me to my room and kissed
me at the door, and when at last I lay down to sleep, my
thought was how could I ever be busy enough, how could I
ever be good enough, how in my little way could I ever hope
to be forgetful enough of myself, devoted enough to him,
and useful enough to others, to show him how I blessed and
honoured him.

901