Page 302 - 1984

save Julia by doubling my own pain, would I do it? Yes, I
would.’ But that was merely an intellectual decision, taken
because he knew that he ought to take it. He did not feel it.
In this place you could not feel anything, except pain and
foreknowledge of pain. Besides, was it possible, when you
were actually suffering it, to wish for any reason that your
own pain should increase? But that question was not an-
swerable yet.
The boots were approaching again. The door opened.
O’Brien came in.
Winston started to his feet. The shock of the sight had
driven all caution out of him. For the first time in many
years he forgot the presence of the telescreen.
‘They’ve got you too!’ he cried.
‘They got me a long time ago,’ said O’Brien with a mild,
almost regretful irony. He stepped aside. From behind him
there emerged a broad-chested guard with a long black
truncheon in his hand.
‘You know this, Winston,’ said O’Brien. ‘Don’t deceive
yourself. You did know it—you have always known it.’
Yes, he saw now, he had always known it. But there was no
time to think of that. All he had eyes for was the truncheon
in the guard’s hand. It might fall anywhere; on the crown,
on the tip of the ear, on the upper arm, on the elbow——
The elbow! He had slumped to his knees, almost para-
lysed, clasping the stricken elbow with his other hand.
Everything had exploded into yellow light. Inconceivable,
inconceivable that one blow could cause such pain! The
light cleared and he could see the other two looking down

01