Page 230 - a-portrait-of-the-artist-as-a-young-man

APPETITUS. In so far as it satisfies the animal craving for
warmth fire is a good. In hell, however, it is an evil.
—Quite so, said the dean, you have certainly hit the nail
on the head.
He rose nimbly and went towards the door, set it ajar and
said:
—A draught is said to be a help in these matters.
As he came back to the hearth, limping slightly but with
a brisk step, Stephen saw the silent soul of a jesuit look out
at him from the pale loveless eyes. Like Ignatius he was lame
but in his eyes burned no spark of Ignatius’s enthusiasm.
Even the legendary craft of the company, a craft subtler
and more secret than its fabled books of secret subtle wis-
dom, had not fired his soul with the energy of apostleship. It
seemed as if he used the shifts and lore and cunning of the
world, as bidden to do, for the greater glory of God, without
joy in their handling or hatred of that in them which was
evil but turning them, with a firm gesture of obedience back
upon themselves and for all this silent service it seemed as if
he loved not at all the master and little, if at all, the ends he
served. SIMILITER ATQUE SENIS BACULUS, he was, as
the founder would have had him, like a staff in an old man’s
hand, to be leaned on in the road at nightfall or in stress of
weather, to lie with a lady’s nosegay on a garden seat, to be
raised in menace.
The dean returned to the hearth and began to stroke his
chin.
—When may we expect to have something from you on
the esthetic question? he asked.

230 A Portrait of the Artist as a Young Man