Page 1085 - war-and-peace

a hundred years. It seems to me that I have never loved any-
one before. You can’t understand it.... Sonya, wait a bit, sit
here,’ and Natasha embraced and kissed her.
‘I had heard that it happens like this, and you must have
heard it too, but it’s only now that I feel such love. It’s not the
same as before. As soon as I saw him I felt he was my master
and I his slave, and that I could not help loving him. Yes, his
slave! Whatever he orders I shall do. You don’t understand
that. What can I do? What can I do, Sonya?’ cried Natasha
with a happy yet frightened expression.
‘But think what you are doing,’ cried Sonya. ‘I can’t leave
it like this. This secret correspondence... How could you let
him go so far?’ she went on, with a horror and disgust she
could hardly conceal.
‘I told you that I have no will,’ Natasha replied. ‘Why
can’t you understand? I love him!’
‘Then I won’t let it come to that... I shall tell!’ cried Sonya,
bursting into tears.
‘What do you mean? For God’s sake... If you tell, you are
my enemy!’ declared Natasha. ‘You want me to be miser-
able, you want us to be separated...’
When she saw Natasha’s fright, Sonya shed tears of
shame and pity for her friend.
‘But what has happened between you?’ she asked. ‘What
has he said to you? Why doesn’t he come to the house?’
Natasha did not answer her questions.
‘For God’s sake, Sonya, don’t tell anyone, don’t torture
me,’ Natasha entreated. ‘Remember no one ought to inter-
fere in such matters! I have confided in you...’

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