Page 33 - Aging Parents - FDCCPublications

operation. She should barely have been eating solid food, let alone driving herself across town.
Knowing she made that judgment call is disheartening but even more frustrating is that the hairdresser offered her a transportation service that she refused. There was a safer option, and she chose not to take it. Again, that fierce independence — or stubbornness — won out over safety.
Sometimes, she will even hear me whispering about her, to which she will respond, “Dave, you better stop it. Remember, I brought you into this world.”
Similarly, suppose her physician determines that she may be incompetent. In that case, they can submit a confidential report to the BMV, which then may prompt her to retake portions of the driving skills test or require her to submit to a medical examination to keep her license.
However, upon reviewing Form 2310, “Request For Statement Of Physician,” available via the Ohio BMV website at http://www. bmv.ohio.gov/bmv_forms.stm, she does not technically have any of the nine physical impairments
PATIENCE, PLANNING AND SUPPORT: REFLECTIONS ON DEALING WITH AGING FAMILY MEMBERS
turns and a few lane changes across a busy road. Perhaps most concerning, it involves her parking her car amongst many others in a tight parking lot, all of which leave me uneasy.
Recently, a family member received a phone call after my mom went to the hairdresser because the staff at the salon was concerned about her driving herself home. Ultimately, a salon staff member drove my mom’s car home while someone else escorted her home in another vehicle.
Not only was the excursion further from her home than Verizon, but she decided to make the outing just days after coming home from the hospital,
where she had undergone an
precious to her. After spending years trapped in an abusive marriage, she cherishes her independence above most other things. To take that away from her might be unforgivable from her perspective.
Per Ohio Revised Code 4507.20, if someone at the Bureau of Motor Vehicles (BMV) has good cause to suspect that a driver is not qualified to be licensed, they can require the license holder to take a driver’s exam, a physical exam, or both to prove fitness. In other words, anyone could notify the BMV that my mom should not be driving, and they could require her to undergo the appropriate examinations to retain her license.
She is not without support. In fact,
my wife takes her grocery requests
at least weekly and delivers
whatever she may need to save her the trip to the store. Yet, we will often see her out at Walmart or get phone calls from members of the community who know us and wonder why she’s out driving on her own. My siblings, who live across the country, can only remind her that she should not be
out driving unnecessarily and let us know when she needs something from the store.
The problem is apparent, and no one dares to take her car away.
While she has never said it outright, I imagine that would be the ultimate disgrace for her. Having the freedom to drive, to get away, even drive around the block, is a freedom that is
listed within the criteria that would prompt a physician to question her fitness to drive. Her doctor would have no more reason to suggest that she is incompetent to drive than my own doctor would have to suggest the same for me.
Still unsure what to do, I decided to dig into the data behind accidents. Are older drivers at a disproportionate risk for causing traffic accidents? I found statistics from Rand.org, that concluded drivers aged 65 and older are 16% more likely to cause an accident than adult drivers between 25 and 64 years old. However, I also learned that drivers under the age of 25 are 188% more likely than drivers over 65 to cause an accident. This means that older drivers pose much less risk to the public than drivers under 25.
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